Please make sure you own these games if you are going to listen to their content!
News: Loading...
Quote:
Who:
Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
Portal 2 Music
Portal 1
Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
Like
+1
Tweet
@Portal2Sounds
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
Popular
Original Order
Random
This site requires that
Javascript be enabled
.
Oh oh oh. This is space! I'm in space!
Listens:
1870
Who:
Core 1
Now let's continue testing.
Listens:
1110
Who:
GLaDOS
Completing this course was not a reason to behave like that.
Listens:
306
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you still there?
Listens:
56786
Who:
Turret
Look out! I'm right behind you! No, of course I'm not. Saw through that too. Forty feet tall, right in front of you. Not my greatest ruse. To be honest. Still a giant robot, though.
Listens:
1196
Who:
Wheatley
Well, maybe it's time I did something then.
Listens:
301
Who:
Wheatley
NNGH! It's not enough! If I'm such a moron, why can't you solve a simple test?
Listens:
1665
Who:
Wheatley
Okay, let's see. Cool line... He's... big. He's... just hangin' there. Okay. Yeah, all right, here we go: 'Hang around.' That might be too easy.
Listens:
548
Who:
Core 2
Those people, in the portrait. They look so familiar...
Listens:
365
Who:
GLaDOS
Good morning. You have been in suspension for nine nine nine... nine nine ni- This courtesy call is to inform you that all test subjects should immediately vacate [FADES OUT]
Listens:
27512
Who:
Announcer
Let's go - let's go to space. Let's go to space.
Listens:
1009
Who:
Core 1
PART FIVE! BOOBYTRAP THE STALEMATE BUTTON!
Listens:
6439
Who:
Wheatley
What, exactly, is wrong with being adopted?
Listens:
1201
Who:
GLaDOS
I was so bored, I actually read the entire literary canon of the human race. Ugh. I hope YOU didn't write any of them.
Listens:
794
Who:
GLaDOS
We're so close! Go press the button!
Listens:
1438
Who:
GLaDOS
I’ll just save the safety information about the dangerous experiment you’re about to do for AFTER the experiment.
Listens:
436
Who:
GLaDOS
Done! Hacked!
Listens:
601
Who:
Wheatley
On the floor. Needing your help. The whole time. All the time. Needing your help.
Listens:
280
Who:
Wheatley
That's another fifty point penalty.
Listens:
582
Who:
GLaDOS
Not paying attennnntion...
Listens:
500
Who:
GLaDOS
I've got an idea! Do what it says, plug me in!
Listens:
291
Who:
Wheatley
Get dirty with this robot! This robot owes you money! This robot owes! You! Money!
Listens:
1312
Who:
Core 2
AH! I've just done it again.
Listens:
349
Who:
Wheatley
Oh! Wow! Good! I did not think that was going to work.
Listens:
896
Who:
Wheatley
'Yeah? Well this thorn... is about to take you down.' Man, that sounded a whole lot better in my head.
Listens:
925
Who:
Core 2
Thank you - I can't believe I'm thanking these people - for staggering your way through Aperture Science's propulsion gel testing. You've made some real contributions to society for a change, and for that, humanity is grateful.
Listens:
1415
Who:
Cave Johnson
No sense of humor.
Listens:
328
Who:
GLaDOS
Hold on! This is a bit tricky!
Listens:
362
Who:
Wheatley
Startles easily. Boo!
Listens:
496
Who:
GLaDOS
Anyone got any bullets?
Listens:
648
Who:
Defective Turret
Facial grimacing.
Listens:
296
Who:
GLaDOS
Well, I tried.
Listens:
401
Who:
Defective Turret
I don't even know what I just said! But I can find out!
Listens:
404
Who:
Wheatley
So, when you kill that guy, do you have a cool line? You know, prepared? Tell you what: Lemme help you with that while you run around.
Listens:
503
Who:
Core 2
This next test involves discouragement redirection cubes. I'd just finished building them before you had your, well, episode. So now we'll both get to see how they work.
Listens:
482
Who:
GLaDOS
I would say extremely deadly but we all know, for you and your amazing ability to be reassembled nothing is deadly.
Listens:
322
Who:
GLaDOS
Is it fun when you degrade yourselves like that?
Listens:
1203
Who:
GLaDOS
Goodbye Caroline!
Listens:
25181
Who:
Caroline
No variances detected.
Listens:
490
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Look at that. It's turning. Ominous. But probably fine. Long as it doesn't start moving up...
Listens:
568
Who:
Wheatley
clickclickclick
Listens:
832
Who:
Defective Turret
If you were wondering how could you annoy me without failing a test. Now you know.
Listens:
288
Who:
GLaDOS
That eager voice you heard is the lovely Caroline, my assistant. Rest assured, she has transferred your honorarium to the charitable organization of your choice. Isn't that right, Caroline?
Listens:
1240
Who:
Cave Johnson
So. If you've got any reservations whatsoever about this plan, now would be the time to voice them.
Listens:
311
Who:
Wheatley
I wonder if the humans will make a statue of me for rescuing them? Oh, don't worry, if they ever write a historical document of my heroic rescue, I will make sure your names are included in the footnotes.
Listens:
543
Who:
GLaDOS
The escape lift. Just there. Come on.
Listens:
315
Who:
Wheatley
Blue is awarded five points!
Listens:
320
Who:
GLaDOS
No! Don't! No! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Listens:
3244
Who:
Wheatley
Emotional problems.
Listens:
415
Who:
GLaDOS
The Fact Sphere is the most handsome sphere.
Listens:
1194
Who:
Core 3
Oh, shut up!
Listens:
2273
Who:
Core 2
Hello again, did you know these are the only set of tests available to you... you are going to need to select them again.
Listens:
1016
Who:
GLaDOS
We're not safe yet. Quick! Follow the walkway.
Listens:
272
Who:
Wheatley
Humans! That's what you look like right now.
Listens:
458
Who:
GLaDOS
We're back!
Listens:
2046
Who:
Defective Turret
Did you know I discovered a way to eradicate poverty? But then you KILLED me. So that's gone.
Listens:
852
Who:
GLaDOS
It's a paradox! There IS no answer.
Listens:
4781
Who:
GLaDOS
I just hate Blue a little more.
Listens:
396
Who:
GLaDOS
Good, that's still working.
Listens:
1965
Who:
GLaDOS
Really? You’re just going to blatantly cheat?
Listens:
661
Who:
GLaDOS
What, are you still alive? You are joking. You have got be kidding me. Well, I'm still in control. AND I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO FIX THIS PLACE.
Listens:
6212
Who:
Wheatley
Come on come on come on!
Listens:
288
Who:
Wheatley
Do you need real encouragement? Let's see if this helps.
Listens:
367
Who:
GLaDOS
Never listens.
Listens:
366
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello!
Listens:
943
Who:
Wheatley
Uhhh, no bullets. Sorry.
Listens:
453
Who:
Defective Turret
And what's this, a lovely handbag? And the three portal device! It's all down there!
Listens:
1063
Who:
Wheatley
If you want to just call it quits, we could just sit here. Forever. That's an option. Option A: Sit here. Do nothing. Option B: Go through there, and if she's alive, she'll almost certainly kill us.
Listens:
510
Who:
Wheatley
clickclickclick
Listens:
983
Who:
Defective Turret
Wanna go to space.
Listens:
993
Who:
Core 1
In Greek myth, Prometheus stole fire from the Gods and gave it to humankind. The jewelry he kept for himself.
Listens:
3089
Who:
Core 3
Right. Hmm. I'm gonna have to hack the door so we can get at it.
Listens:
300
Who:
Wheatley
Yahh. Gehhh!
Listens:
713
Who:
Wheatley
The most poisonous fish in the world is the orange ruffy. Everything but its eyes are made of a deadly poison. The ruffy's eyes are composed of a less harmful, deadly poison.
Listens:
2375
Who:
Core 3
Excuse me
Listens:
2074
Who:
Turret
If that doesn't motivate you, I'm not sure what will.
Listens:
275
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, come on!
Listens:
562
Who:
Defective Turret
No one has ever completed this test before. The humans must have reconfigured it from my original plans.
Listens:
325
Who:
GLaDOS
What?
Listens:
387
Who:
Wheatley
Go! Go go go!
Listens:
276
Who:
Wheatley
OW.
Listens:
732
Who:
Wheatley
Hold on! The neurotoxin levels are going down.
Listens:
332
Who:
Wheatley
Hello.
Listens:
4158
Who:
Turret
Gah!
Listens:
388
Who:
Wheatley
Plug me into that stick on the wall over there. I'll show you something.
Listens:
432
Who:
Wheatley
According to most advanced algorithms, the world's best name is Craig.
Listens:
4428
Who:
Core 3
We will both die because of your negligence.
Listens:
1239
Who:
Core 3
That's the spirit!
Listens:
319
Who:
Wheatley
Have you worked out the one good trait humans have, yet?
Listens:
517
Who:
GLaDOS
Do you know the biggest lesson I learned from what you did? I discovered I have a sort of black-box quick-save feature. In the event of a catastrophic failure, the last two minutes of my life are preserved for analysis.
Listens:
1230
Who:
GLaDOS
Hooray!
Listens:
4992
Who:
Turret
Aristotle versus Mashy-spike-plate!
Listens:
28067
Who:
Wheatley
Are you scared to save those humans?
Listens:
277
Who:
GLaDOS
Great work! Because this message is prerecorded, any observations related to your performance are speculation on our part. Please disregard any undeserved compliments.
Listens:
2971
Who:
Announcer
Was that course too difficult?
Listens:
318
Who:
GLaDOS
I can't hold on! Come on!
Listens:
298
Who:
Wheatley
To maintain a constant testing cycle, I simulate daylight at all hours and add adrenal vapor to your oxygen supply. So you may be confused about the passage of time. The point is, yesterday was your birthday. I thought you'd want to know.
Listens:
3628
Who:
GLaDOS
That's his voice up ahead.
Listens:
285
Who:
GLaDOS
Hmm. This emancipation grill is broken.
Listens:
507
Who:
GLaDOS
Uh, yeah, what?
Listens:
489
Who:
Defective Turret
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
Like these quotes? Share them with your friends!
