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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
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Portal 1 Music
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TF2 Music
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Facial grimacing.
Listens:
296
Who:
GLaDOS
Blue is penalized
Listens:
412
Who:
GLaDOS
Do it!
Listens:
461
Who:
Wheatley
clickclickclick
Listens:
536
Who:
Defective Turret
You might want to notice the moat area... rather large. Not to mention deadly. [laughs]
Listens:
381
Who:
Wheatley
Notice the moat area. Very deadly. Extremely dangerous. Eventually. Not at the moment. Still working on it, still working on it.
Listens:
400
Who:
Wheatley
Nooooooooo...
Listens:
1571
Who:
Defective Turret
Annnnd we're back!
Listens:
883
Who:
Defective Turret
A computer. Not a surprise. Expected. Check that off the list. Computer identified. Tick.
Listens:
455
Who:
Wheatley
In case you thought to yourself, 'I've missed the window of time to voice my reservations.' Still open.
Listens:
282
Who:
Wheatley
Welcome back to the Computer Intelligence Training and Enrichment Center Human Test Subject Research Center.
Listens:
818
Who:
GLaDOS
You do know I can't wave back right?
Listens:
441
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay. Plan B, subsection one: Stand still so I can bring you back.
Listens:
616
Who:
GLaDOS
I know you.
Listens:
559
Who:
GLaDOS
They'll probably throw you a party.
Listens:
416
Who:
GLaDOS
You have just passed through an Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grill, which erases most Aperture Science equipment that touches it.
Listens:
356
Who:
GLaDOS
The Enrichment Center will now provide a list of numbers and fruits. Write them down as they will become important later in the experiment. Not the fruits, though. Seven. Avocado. Forty. Please continue into the next test chamber.
Listens:
953
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes!
Listens:
1117
Who:
GLaDOS
Her name is Caroline.
Listens:
4268
Who:
Turret
RUN! Come on! I'm closing the doors!
Listens:
352
Who:
Wheatley
As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers.
Listens:
1513
Who:
GLaDOS
Right on that stick over there. Just put me right on it.
Listens:
278
Who:
Wheatley
Have I ever told you the qualities I love most in you? In order: Number one: resolving things, love the ways you resolve things. Particularly disputes. Number one, tied: Button-pushing. Two things I love about you: Button pushing and the ability to resolve things. Chiefly disputes.
Listens:
702
Who:
Wheatley
I can't get over how small you are!
Listens:
402
Who:
Wheatley
While I cannot control the world outside of the testing courses, the reassembly machine can continue with his work.
Listens:
277
Who:
GLaDOS
Had a bit of a brain wave. There I was, smashing some steel plates together, and I thought, 'yes, it's deadly. But what's missing? What's missing?' And I thought lots of sharp bits welded onto the flat bits.
Listens:
1875
Who:
Wheatley
Orange, Blue and I were just discussing your behavior on the last few tests.
Listens:
299
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello and, again, welcome to the Aperture Science Computer-Aided Enrichment Center.
Listens:
8849
Who:
GLaDOS
MOVE.
Listens:
480
Who:
Wheatley
Cryptic.
Listens:
385
Who:
GLaDOS
Blue, how well do you really know Orange? Do you trust Orange? What if I told you, you aren't Orange's first cooperative partner?
Listens:
447
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm telling 'em, keep your pants on.
Listens:
3588
Who:
Cave Johnson
I'm going to be honest with you now. Not fake honest like before, but real honest, like you're incapable of. I know you're up to something.
Listens:
437
Who:
GLaDOS
Underestimates scope of work. They all do.
Listens:
309
Who:
GLaDOS
[sound of pages turning] Oh, sorry. Hope that didn't disturb you just then. It was the sound of books. Pages being turned.
Listens:
1378
Who:
Wheatley
Orange, is there something you would like to say?
Listens:
291
Who:
GLaDOS
GET IN!
Listens:
283
Who:
Wheatley
The atomic weight of Germanium is seven two point six four.
Listens:
782
Who:
Core 3
You're doing great!
Listens:
434
Who:
Core 2
Hey! How's it going? Here I am again!
Listens:
301
Who:
Wheatley
Well done. In the event that oxygen is no longer available in the Enrichment Center, an auxiliary air supply will be provided to you by an Aperture Science Test Associate, if one exists.
Listens:
621
Who:
GLaDOS
[clap clap]
Listens:
21369
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey.
Listens:
1026
Who:
Core 1
'Hang ten?' That might work if there were ten of him. Do you think there might be nine more of this guy somewhere?
Listens:
633
Who:
Core 2
Crushing's too good for him. First he'll spend a year in the incinerator. Year two: Cryogenic refrigeration wing. Then TEN years in the chamber I built where all the robots scream at you. THEN I'll kill him.
Listens:
4246
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, look. There's a deer! You probably can't see it. Get closer.
Listens:
1245
Who:
GLaDOS
Here's an interesting fact: you're not breathing real air. It's too expensive to pump this far down. We just take carbon dioxide out of a room, freshen it up a little, and pump it back in. So you'll be breathing the same room full of air for the rest of your life. I thought that was interesting.
Listens:
4722
Who:
GLaDOS
After seeing what he's done to my facility -- after we take over again -- is it alright if I kill him?
Listens:
446
Who:
GLaDOS
Let's keep moving. The factory entrance must be around here somewhere.
Listens:
277
Who:
Wheatley
Hey, hold on whoa whoa whoa whoa!
Listens:
723
Who:
Defective Turret
Stay casual when I tell you this: I think I smell neurotoxin.
Listens:
394
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah, doubt it.
Listens:
389
Who:
Wheatley
Undelete, undelete! Where's the undelete button?
Listens:
2596
Who:
Wheatley
Oi, it's close... can you see? Am I gonna make it through? Have I got enough space?
Listens:
730
Who:
Wheatley
Orange, now you're just being cruel. Orange receives 25 science collaboration points.
Listens:
373
Who:
GLaDOS
Ha! Missed me that time. Ohhh, you were solving-nevermind, carry on. My fault.
Listens:
468
Who:
Wheatley
Ha! Death trap!
Listens:
763
Who:
Wheatley
Sorry, what's going on over there? You know, I'm actually over here, still thinking really hard!
Listens:
331
Who:
Wheatley
Die!
Listens:
1625
Who:
Defective Turret
No can do.
Listens:
358
Who:
Defective Turret
No! Don't! No! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Listens:
3244
Who:
Wheatley
Just pop a portal right behind me there, and come on through to the other side.
Listens:
283
Who:
Wheatley
It seems rather earlier to require reassembly.
Listens:
277
Who:
GLaDOS
Alright, just a second...
Listens:
279
Who:
Wheatley
Breathes with mouth open.
Listens:
281
Who:
GLaDOS
YES! I KNEW someone was alive in here!
Listens:
385
Who:
Wheatley
Nonononononono!
Listens:
72440
Who:
GLaDOS
Orange, I agree. I never noticed that about Blue before.
Listens:
280
Who:
GLaDOS
Good. Now please return to your bed.
Listens:
1601
Who:
Announcer
Earth earth earth.
Listens:
1055
Who:
Core 1
You are simply experiencing a rare reaction, in which the Material Emancipation Grill may have erased the ear tubes inside your head.
Listens:
398
Who:
GLaDOS
You know who found that interesting? Nobody. That didn't affect anybody's life in any way whatsoever. Life would be exactly the same if you hadn't said anything.
Listens:
2019
Who:
Core 2
After you told me to turn the beam off, I thought I'd lost you. Went poking around for other test subjects. No luck there. Everyone's still all dead.
Listens:
421
Who:
Wheatley
I agree, Orange. That was entertaining.
Listens:
277
Who:
GLaDOS
Did you think the electrical switch was down there?
Listens:
278
Who:
GLaDOS
It's interesting. You won't regret it. I promise.
Listens:
297
Who:
Wheatley
Is that camera is hooked into the lock?
Listens:
274
Who:
GLaDOS
I think I hear the bird! Pick me up!
Listens:
1292
Who:
GLaDOS
Wait. Why DID you trundle over here? You're not HUNGRY, are you? It's hard to see, what's that in your hand? Knowing you it's a deep fryer.
Listens:
3645
Who:
GLaDOS
First thing I noticed about you: 'Now there's a lady who could resolve any button-based disputes,' I thought. A diamond in the rough, if you will--a a bloody natural. A born dispute resolution advisor in need of a button.
Listens:
530
Who:
Wheatley
clickclickclick
Listens:
454
Who:
Defective Turret
Congratulations! This pre-recorded congratulations assumes you have mastered the principles of portal momentum.
Listens:
757
Who:
GLaDOS
ahhhhEHHHHHH!
Listens:
1299
Who:
Wheatley
If I stop watching, I'm sure you'll get bored of this.
Listens:
303
Who:
GLaDOS
Miss you!
Listens:
737
Who:
GLaDOS
If he's not getting his solution euphoria, we could be in a lot of trouble.
Listens:
460
Who:
GLaDOS
You were right, Orange. Blue was dumb enough to fall for your trap.
Listens:
582
Who:
GLaDOS
The answer is beneath us.
Listens:
2085
Who:
Turret
I thought going back to these old tests would satisfy me. But try as you might to fail this next test, I still won't be satisfied.
Listens:
283
Who:
GLaDOS
Ha ha, YES! I knew you'd solve it!
Listens:
312
Who:
Wheatley
This is the last test for the standard course. It's just something I whipped up for you. I thought you might enjoy a challenge for once.
Listens:
292
Who:
GLaDOS
Press the button again.
Listens:
1052
Who:
GLaDOS
It flew off.
Listens:
386
Who:
GLaDOS
All right. We're working on a little teleportation experiment. Now, this doesn't work with all skin types, so try to remember which skin is yours, and if it doesn't teleport along with you, we'll do what we can to sew you right back into it.
Listens:
1658
Who:
Cave Johnson
I'm still here, I'm still working, I haven't forgotten about you!
Listens:
290
Who:
Wheatley
Why do I hate you so much? You ever wonder that? I'm brilliant. I’m not bragging. It's an objective fact. I'm the most massive collection of wisdom that’s ever existed. And I hate you. It can't be for no reason. You must deserve it.
Listens:
31285
Who:
GLaDOS
clickclickclick
Listens:
459
Who:
Defective Turret
Not getting better with age!
Listens:
481
Who:
Defective Turret
Are we in space yet? What's the hold-up? Gotta go to space. Gotta go to SPACE.
Listens:
1542
Who:
Core 1
If we start making a list of things that aren't here, we could be here all night. You know, pens for instance. Let's stick with things we can see. Not stuff that isn't here.
Listens:
322
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
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