Please make sure you own these games if you are going to listen to their content!
News: Loading...
Quote:
Who:
Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
Portal 2 Music
Portal 1
Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
Like
+1
Tweet
@Portal2Sounds
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
Popular
Original Order
Random
This site requires that
Javascript be enabled
.
Yeah, what?
Listens:
233
Who:
Defective Turret
Hey! How's it going? Here I am again!
Listens:
152
Who:
Wheatley
Most test subjects do experience some cognitive deterioration after a few months in suspension. Now you've been under for... quite a lot longer, and it's not out of the question that you might have a very minor case of serious brain damage.
Listens:
3867
Who:
Wheatley
Alright. Your funeral, pal.
Listens:
353
Who:
Defective Turret
You are going to die in this room.
Listens:
488
Who:
Core 3
Let's see here, exit exit exit... there is no exit.
Listens:
324
Who:
Wheatley
Non-defective turret testing active.
Listens:
547
Who:
Announcer
Come on through to the other side.
Listens:
149
Who:
Wheatley
Substitute core, are you ready to start the procedure?
Listens:
805
Who:
Announcer
Stubborn.
Listens:
161
Who:
GLaDOS
No! No! NONONO!
Listens:
662
Who:
Wheatley
By completing all test courses, you have achieved Level C security clearance. You may now access all testing courses and three of Aperture Science's 176 restrooms.
Listens:
842
Who:
Announcer
And FOOLISH! No way out. At my mercy. And I don't have any. You're at my nothing.
Listens:
663
Who:
Wheatley
Alright, you can turn around now!
Listens:
229
Who:
Wheatley
Moves lips while reading.
Listens:
160
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! But when I DO test... ohhhhh, man alive! Nothing feels better. It's just... why I've gotta test, I've gotta test!
Listens:
1350
Who:
Wheatley
Target lost
Listens:
2723
Who:
Turret
Absolutely no improvement.
Listens:
463
Who:
Defective Turret
Not bad. I forgot how good you are at this. You should pace yourself, though. We have A LOT of tests to do.
Listens:
2044
Who:
GLaDOS
Hot water freezes quicker than cold water.
Listens:
383
Who:
Core 3
Fantastic.
Listens:
560
Who:
Defective Turret
Okay. I guess emotional outbursts require more than one point six volts. Now we know that. We just need to relax. We're still going to find out what the hell's going on here. But calmly.
Listens:
1057
Who:
GLaDOS
Fact not found.
Listens:
488
Who:
Core 3
Hi there!
Listens:
1383
Who:
Defective Turret
Yeah, I'm uh... I'm a bad man!
Listens:
649
Who:
Defective Turret
From here we transport you to the new testing course.
Listens:
168
Who:
GLaDOS
Just say 'Apple'. Easy word, isn't it? 'Apple'.
Listens:
543
Who:
Wheatley
You're just delaying the inevitable. You cannot run from my bombs forever. Well, you can if I keep aiming them poorly. But I'll get better as we go, and you'll just get tired.
Listens:
686
Who:
Wheatley
Ha ha ha ha ha, good one.
Listens:
1765
Who:
GLaDOS
If I'd known you'd let yourself get captured this easily, I would have just dangled a turkey leg on a rope from the ceiling.
Listens:
1508
Who:
GLaDOS
You know what, this plan is so good, I'm going to give you a sporting chance and turn off the neurotoxin. I'm joking. Of course. Goodbye.
Listens:
1044
Who:
Wheatley
At the time of this recording, Federal disclosure policies require us to inform you that this next test is probably lethal and to redirect you to a safer test environment.
Listens:
1113
Who:
Announcer
Sorry.
Listens:
311
Who:
GLaDOS
If you have trouble with simple counting, use the following mnemonic device: one comes before two comes before 60 comes after 12 comes before six trillion comes after 504. This will make your earlier counting difficulties seem like no big deal.
Listens:
2413
Who:
Core 3
Stop failing, you need to find the vault door.
Listens:
164
Who:
GLaDOS
It shouldn't be hard to stay alive long enough to find him.
Listens:
151
Who:
GLaDOS
Didn't even get to the good part yet. Twist ending.
Listens:
434
Who:
Wheatley
Nicely Done!
Listens:
354
Who:
Wheatley
Oh no, you've got it, you've got it! Yes! Put him in there! Let's see how this place likes a crap turret.
Listens:
347
Who:
Wheatley
Also, are you alive? That's important, should have asked that first.
Listens:
525
Who:
Wheatley
I just thought you find that interesting, most winners do.
Listens:
149
Who:
GLaDOS
Designed this test myself. It's a little bit difficult.
Listens:
150
Who:
Wheatley
But you were different weren't you? Such a good jumper. Problem solver. Clever. But ambitious. That's your Achilles Heel. Mine's-oh! Oh! Almost told you. Clever, clever girl. Again: brain damaged like a fox, you.
Listens:
1726
Who:
Wheatley
Facial grimacing.
Listens:
160
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello!
Listens:
601
Who:
Wheatley
Atmosphere. Black holes. Astronauts. Nebulas. Jupiter. The Big Dipper.
Listens:
2105
Who:
Core 1
This next test... [boom!] ..is... [BOOM!] dangerous. I'll be right back.
Listens:
39864
Who:
GLaDOS
Get mad!
Listens:
25198
Who:
Turret
I have noticed you two have become extremely close. I'm not sure I like that.
Listens:
154
Who:
GLaDOS
Just hang in there for five more - What? Jerry, you can't fire me for that! Yes, JERRY -- OR, maybe your prejudiced worksite should have accommodated a nanobot of my size. Thanks for the hate crime, Jer!
Listens:
933
Who:
Wheatley
Still running. Alright. Looks tiring. Tell you what - you stop running and I'll stop bombing you... That seems fair.
Listens:
284
Who:
Wheatley
Do you know the biggest lesson I learned from what you did? I discovered I have a sort of black-box quick-save feature. In the event of a catastrophic failure, the last two minutes of my life are preserved for analysis.
Listens:
898
Who:
GLaDOS
Try to get us down there. I'll hit him with a paradox.
Listens:
347
Who:
GLaDOS
Plug me in, plug me in!
Listens:
154
Who:
Wheatley
Oh no, I'm one of the bad ones, aren't I?
Listens:
727
Who:
Defective Turret
You never considered that maybe I tested you to give the endless hours of your pointless existence some structure and meaning. Maybe to help you concentrate, so just maybe you’d think of something more worthwhile to do with your sorry life.
Listens:
1883
Who:
GLaDOS
Plug me into that stick on the wall over there. I'll show you something.
Listens:
266
Who:
Wheatley
Gonna be in space.
Listens:
567
Who:
Core 1
Hey, it is GREAT seeing you guys again. Seriously. It turns out I'm a little short on test subjects right now. So this works out PERFECT.
Listens:
237
Who:
Wheatley
Well, on with the test.
Listens:
153
Who:
Wheatley
I'm in space.
Listens:
1346
Who:
Core 1
Please note the incandescent particle field across the exit. This Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grill will vaporize any unauthorized equipment that passes through it.
Listens:
607
Who:
Announcer
Ah! Brilliant. You made it through, well done.
Listens:
244
Who:
Wheatley
Seriously, though. Goodbye.
Listens:
1727
Who:
GLaDOS
Thank you, that was very brave of you to tell me.
Listens:
230
Who:
GLaDOS
Nonononononono!
Listens:
59720
Who:
GLaDOS
This ain't Marquis of Queensberry Rules, sweetie! Pour on the mustard!
Listens:
381
Who:
Core 2
Your test times show you are going too slowly.
Listens:
195
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello.
Listens:
1750
Who:
Defective Turret
Here it comes, pal!
Listens:
274
Who:
Defective Turret
But just work with me.
Listens:
170
Who:
GLaDOS
All right, your funeral. Your beautiful-lady-corpse open casket funeral.
Listens:
557
Who:
Core 2
Die!
Listens:
993
Who:
Defective Turret
We're running out of time...
Listens:
217
Who:
GLaDOS
What's a guy gotta do to get some bullets around here?
Listens:
688
Who:
Defective Turret
Over there is where they used to keep the old neurotoxin release button. BIG responsibility, the guy in charge of the neurotoxin release button. And guess who he WAS? He wasn't me. But I was his assistant, and I did a lot of his admin.
Listens:
584
Who:
Wheatley
Hey lady. Lady.
Listens:
773
Who:
Core 1
Agh, just... I just gotta get it through here...
Listens:
168
Who:
Wheatley
Great work! Because this message is prerecorded, any observations related to your performance are speculation on our part. Please disregard any undeserved compliments.
Listens:
2317
Who:
Announcer
We should be getting close. Ohh, I can't wait to see the look on her face. No neurotoxin, no turrets--she'll never know what hit her!
Listens:
236
Who:
Wheatley
I hardly think you're even trying with these gestures anymore.
Listens:
159
Who:
GLaDOS
It's like you're just machines.
Listens:
150
Who:
GLaDOS
Um, hello?
Listens:
807
Who:
Turret
Ohhh, it hasn't done it.
Listens:
157
Who:
Wheatley
Well, what does a neck-bearded old engineer know about fashion? He probably - Oh, wait. It's a she. Still, what does she know? Oh wait, it says she has a medical degree. In fashion! From France!
Listens:
3487
Who:
GLaDOS
Aggressive. I like that.
Listens:
619
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, you win.
Listens:
514
Who:
Turret
Perfect, the door's malfunctioning. I guess somebody is going to have to repair it. No, it's okay, I'll do that too. I'll be right back. Don't touch anything.
Listens:
453
Who:
GLaDOS
Don't make lemonade!
Listens:
15836
Who:
Turret
The Fact Sphere is a good sphere, with many friends.
Listens:
548
Who:
Core 3
We all agree you should stop.
Listens:
214
Who:
GLaDOS
And whose fault do you think it's going to be when the management comes down here and finds ten thousand flipping vegetables?
Listens:
1199
Who:
Wheatley
No, wait, wait!
Listens:
346
Who:
Defective Turret
I'm going through the list of test subjects in cryogenic storage. I managed to find two with your last name. A man and a woman. So that's interesting. It's a small world.
Listens:
404
Who:
GLaDOS
Right. Hmm. I'm gonna have to hack the door so we can get at it.
Listens:
189
Who:
Wheatley
Look for a switch that says ESCAPE POD. Alright? Don't touch ANYTHING else.
Listens:
313
Who:
Wheatley
And... forty potato batteries. Embarrassing. I realize they’re children. Still: low hanging fruit. Barely science, really.
Listens:
1049
Who:
Wheatley
Pop a portal. Behind me, on the wall. Come on through.
Listens:
158
Who:
Wheatley
Estás usando este software de traducción de forma incorrecta. Por favor, consulta el manual.
Listens:
4985
Who:
Wheatley
Seriously, I'm not joking. Could you just turn around for a second?
Listens:
268
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
Like these quotes? Share them with your friends!
