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But you were different weren't you? Such a good jumper. Problem solver. Clever. But ambitious. That's your Achilles Heel. Mine's-oh! Oh! Almost told you. Clever, clever girl. Again: brain damaged like a fox, you.
Listens:
2277
Who:
Wheatley
[whispered] ...I think she's lying...
Listens:
569
Who:
Wheatley
Can't breathe...
Listens:
898
Who:
Turret
Do you know where I was?
Listens:
309
Who:
GLaDOS
Always sleeping.
Listens:
548
Who:
GLaDOS
You will be dead soon.
Listens:
880
Who:
Core 3
Ignores directions.
Listens:
324
Who:
GLaDOS
That poster! Go look at it for a second, would you?
Listens:
680
Who:
GLaDOS
The billionth digit of Pi is 9.
Listens:
1139
Who:
Core 3
These tests are potentially lethal when communication, teamwork, and mutual respect are not employed at all times. Naturally this will pose an interesting challenge for one of you, given the other's performance so far.
Listens:
1155
Who:
GLaDOS
Alright, stop moving.
Listens:
433
Who:
Wheatley
Space wanna go wanna go to space wanna go to space
Listens:
1020
Who:
Core 1
How's that taste, pal?
Listens:
468
Who:
Core 2
You're saying to yourself, why should I jump into the pit? I'll tell you why. Guess who's down there? Your parents! You're not adopted after all! It's your natural parents down there in the pit. Should have mentioned it before. But I didn't. So jump on down and reunite with mommy and daddy.
Listens:
3015
Who:
Wheatley
Is anyone there?
Listens:
7704
Who:
Turret
Whales are twice as intelligent, and three times as delicious, as humans.
Listens:
1713
Who:
Core 3
As the name implies, there are only two minor differences: One, the board; two, the rules.
Listens:
469
Who:
GLaDOS
But you two have become quite the team. Extremely close.
Listens:
387
Who:
GLaDOS
Ha ha! Gotcha right where I want ya!
Listens:
701
Who:
Defective Turret
Busybody.
Listens:
299
Who:
GLaDOS
Oo. Oo. Oo. Lady. Oo. Lady. Oo. Let's go to space.
Listens:
18821
Who:
Core 1
Oh oh oh oh. Wait wait. Wait I know. I know. I know wait. Space.
Listens:
1345
Who:
Core 1
Keep moving, keep moving...
Listens:
303
Who:
Wheatley
Blue, why did you do that to Orange?
Listens:
349
Who:
GLaDOS
Quick question: Have you been working out? Because there's no evidence of it. I'm not a plastic cup. We will be landing with some force. So a bit of grip. Just using grip. Classic grip.
Listens:
317
Who:
Wheatley
Long bathroom breaks.
Listens:
348
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes sir, Mr. Johnson
Listens:
9450
Who:
Caroline
clickclickclick
Listens:
534
Who:
Defective Turret
Okay. Okay. Okay listen: New plan. Act natural act natural. We've done nothing wrong.
Listens:
439
Who:
Wheatley
Hey, it is GREAT seeing you guys again. Seriously. It turns out I'm a little short on test subjects right now. So this works out PERFECT.
Listens:
431
Who:
Wheatley
Not paying attennnntion...
Listens:
510
Who:
GLaDOS
Hopeless. Just hopeless.
Listens:
482
Who:
GLaDOS
You're going to hurt yourself doing that and then I will be ECSTATIC.
Listens:
856
Who:
GLaDOS
...What are you doing?...
Listens:
1271
Who:
GLaDOS
Alright. Still nothing, let's keep moving.
Listens:
332
Who:
Wheatley
The Fact Sphere is always right.
Listens:
773
Who:
Core 3
Why...
Listens:
2845
Who:
Turret
Illegal operation
Listens:
1186
Who:
Turret
Thank you!
Listens:
4747
Who:
Turret
Right. Hmm. I'm gonna have to hack the door so we can get at it.
Listens:
354
Who:
Wheatley
I know you.
Listens:
572
Who:
GLaDOS
Cube- and button-based testing remains an important tool for science, even in a dire emergency.
Listens:
1326
Who:
Announcer
Well done! The Enrichment Center reminds you that although circumstances may appear bleak, you are not alone. All Aperture Science personality constructs will remain functional in apocalyptic, low power environments of as few as 1.1 volts.
Listens:
2299
Who:
Announcer
Oops. You trapped yourself. I guess that's it then. Thanks for testing. You may as well lie down and get acclimated to the being dead position.
Listens:
1510
Who:
GLaDOS
It is incorrectly noted that Thomas Edison invented 'push-ups' in 1878. Nikolai Tesla had in fact patented the activity three years earlier, under the name 'Tesla-cize.'
Listens:
1576
Who:
Core 3
Probably ought to bring you up to speed on something right now.
Listens:
331
Who:
Wheatley
Oh my god.
Listens:
2839
Who:
GLaDOS
I’m sorry, Subject Blue.
Listens:
452
Who:
GLaDOS
The one you risked your life to get to. So you could escape certain death. No rush.
Listens:
291
Who:
Wheatley
Awwww
Listens:
3092
Who:
Turret
Okay, I've just gotta concentrate!
Listens:
320
Who:
Wheatley
It appears you're developing human traits. The worst human traits.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
Just turn around.
Listens:
293
Who:
Wheatley
As founder and CEO of Aperture Science, I thank you for your participation and hope we can count on you for another round of tests.
Listens:
1138
Who:
Cave Johnson
You're okay! Great! Come on!
Listens:
315
Who:
Wheatley
Test chamber completed. In the interest of science, the Enrichment Center proudly presents the following list of numbers: Nine. Seven. Fifty. Three. Seven hundred and seven.
Listens:
1375
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh.
Listens:
445
Who:
GLaDOS
What are you doing?
Listens:
1067
Who:
Turret
Avoid defective defective turrets as they may still be active.
Listens:
912
Who:
Announcer
Dreams are the subconscious mind's way of reminding people to go to school naked and have their teeth fall out.
Listens:
1298
Who:
Core 3
You did it!
Listens:
468
Who:
GLaDOS
Let's try this again. Try to make your way across the machinery.
Listens:
286
Who:
Wheatley
Oh, hang on. What if we gave it something ELSE to scan?
Listens:
320
Who:
Wheatley
Most of them are simply good test subjects.
Listens:
290
Who:
GLaDOS
Hm. Let's try this way.
Listens:
315
Who:
Wheatley
Gonna be in space.
Listens:
846
Who:
Core 1
Yes. Let's all laugh. Ha. Ha. Ha.
Listens:
5996
Who:
GLaDOS
Don't listen to her! It IS true that you don't have the qualifications. But you've got something more important than that. A finger, with which to press that button, so that she won't kill us.
Listens:
1380
Who:
Wheatley
And what's this, a lovely handbag? And the three portal device! It's all down there!
Listens:
1096
Who:
Wheatley
It emphasizes teamwork.
Listens:
296
Who:
GLaDOS
Excellent. The Enrichment Center reminds you that bold, persistent experimentation is the hallmark of good science.
Listens:
446
Who:
GLaDOS
After seeing what he's done to my facility -- after we take over again -- is it alright if I kill him?
Listens:
478
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay. Here's a good idea. You should definitely press that button.
Listens:
411
Who:
Wheatley
Still, though, let's get mad! If we're going to explode, let's at least explode with some dignity.
Listens:
1915
Who:
GLaDOS
No hard fealings
Listens:
1086
Who:
Turret
But now, looking around, seeing Aperture restored to its former glory? You don't have to worry about leaving EVER again. I mean that.
Listens:
463
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh well. We have warehouses FULL of the things. Absolutely worthless. I'm happy to get rid of them.
Listens:
985
Who:
GLaDOS
Alright, let me explain again. Pop a portal. Behind me. Alright? And come on through.
Listens:
336
Who:
Wheatley
This on? [thump thump] Hey. Listen up down there. That thing's called an elevator. Not a bathroom.
Listens:
2199
Who:
Cave Johnson
Begin juggling test in three. Two. One.
Listens:
823
Who:
GLaDOS
Why should I be kept informed about the life functions of the ten thousand bloody test subjects I'm supposed to be in charge of?
Listens:
452
Who:
Wheatley
This is just a thought experiment, just to see how much time you'll waste thinking about these worthless documents. The correct time is zero seconds.
Listens:
510
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay don't panic! Allright? Stop panicking! I can still stop this. Ahh. Oh there's a password. It's fine. I'll just hack it. Not a problem... umm...
Listens:
941
Who:
Wheatley
Hurry!
Listens:
317
Who:
Wheatley
On the floor. Needing your help. The whole time. All the time. Needing your help.
Listens:
309
Who:
Wheatley
You’ve made your point.
Listens:
825
Who:
Turret
Or maybe he still is, in which case, wow, that's kind of sad.
Listens:
1620
Who:
GLaDOS
Say. Remember when we cleared the air back there? Is there... anything you want to say to me? Anything?
Listens:
488
Who:
GLaDOS
Each portal gun may create two self-contained portals.
Listens:
398
Who:
GLaDOS
BIRD BIRD BIRD BIRD
Listens:
106283
Who:
Wheatley
Lady.
Listens:
636
Who:
Core 1
Congratulations. Your ability to complete this test proves the humans wrong. They described it as impossible, deadly, cruel, and one test subject even had the nerve to call it broken.
Listens:
1080
Who:
GLaDOS
Well done. In the event that oxygen is no longer available in the Enrichment Center, an auxiliary air supply will be provided to you by an Aperture Science Test Associate, if one exists.
Listens:
671
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm different...
Listens:
69698
Who:
Turret
He's found the cooperative testing initiative. It's... em, just something I came up with to phase out human test subjects.
Listens:
379
Who:
GLaDOS
Time to watch the master.
Listens:
501
Who:
Defective Turret
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm going. Going to space.
Listens:
1011
Who:
Core 1
Alright. Your funeral, pal.
Listens:
608
Who:
Defective Turret
Warning: Central core is eighty percent corrupt.
Listens:
2425
Who:
Announcer
I hope you brought something stronger than a portal gun this time.
Listens:
1257
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
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