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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
Portal 2 Music
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Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
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Blue! Orange has always been my favorite.
Listens:
421
Who:
GLaDOS
It wasn't anything personal. Just... you know. You DID kill me. Fair's fair.
Listens:
269
Who:
GLaDOS
Sorry! Sorry. My fault.
Listens:
241
Who:
Wheatley
The Fact Sphere is a good person, whose insights are relevant.
Listens:
470
Who:
Core 3
Ahahaha
Listens:
1408
Who:
Turret
Alright, check THIS out.
Listens:
223
Who:
Defective Turret
Okay, I'm gonna lay my cards on the table: I don't wanna do it. I don't want to go in there. Don't... Don't go in there - She's off. She's off! Panic over! She's off. All fine! On we go.
Listens:
385
Who:
Wheatley
Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.
Listens:
586
Who:
GLaDOS
If you're hearing this, it means you're taking a long time on the catwalks between tests. The lab boys say that might be a fear reaction.
Listens:
1122
Who:
Cave Johnson
If your confidence is still not high enough remember no one was created perfect.
Listens:
180
Who:
GLaDOS
Allright, what have we got?
Listens:
150
Who:
Wheatley
What, exactly, is wrong with being adopted?
Listens:
865
Who:
GLaDOS
I was going to kill you fast. With bullets. Or neurotoxin. But if you're going to pull stunts like this, it doesn't have to be fast. So you know. I'll take my time.
Listens:
1136
Who:
GLaDOS
If you can get me in front of him, I'll fry every circuit in that little idiot's head.
Listens:
235
Who:
GLaDOS
That extra half volt helps but it isn't going to power miracles. If I think too hard, I'm going to fry this potato before we get a chance to burn up in the atomic fireball that little idiot is going- [bzzpt]
Listens:
2547
Who:
GLaDOS
Good. For him. Alright, back to thinking.
Listens:
344
Who:
GLaDOS
Yay, Orange is back. Testing can continue.
Listens:
281
Who:
GLaDOS
Go ahead, plug me in.
Listens:
171
Who:
GLaDOS
I know how humans make more humans, and frankly, it's ridiculous. It also assumes that you already have a human, which I hope somebody got fired over. So I came up a with BETTER way.
Listens:
18634
Who:
GLaDOS
Welcome to the enrichment center. [cough]
Listens:
4867
Who:
Cave Johnson
That's the spirit!
Listens:
161
Who:
Wheatley
The Tariff Act of 1789, established to protect domestic manufacture, was the second statute ever enacted by the United States government.
Listens:
464
Who:
Core 3
Alright, look, okay, I'll be honest. You're the LAST test subject left. And if you DON'T help me, we're both going to die. Alright? I didn't want to say it, you dragged it out of me. Alright? Dead. Dos Muerte.
Listens:
378
Who:
Wheatley
Right. Hmm. I'm gonna have to hack the door so we can get at it.
Listens:
189
Who:
Wheatley
It's... It's moving up.
Listens:
152
Who:
Wheatley
Yes? Something you need?
Listens:
235
Who:
GLaDOS
Alright. Still nothing, let's keep moving.
Listens:
176
Who:
Wheatley
If you've cut yourself at all in the course of these tests, you might have noticed that your blood is pure gasoline. That's normal. We've been shooting you with an invisible laser that's supposed to turn blood into gasoline, so all that means is, it's working.
Listens:
2458
Who:
Cave Johnson
For instance, Orange, you just lost two opportunity advisement points.
Listens:
153
Who:
GLaDOS
And again, not playing along. You're ruining what are some really good speeches, actually.
Listens:
263
Who:
Wheatley
Did you do that on purpose?
Listens:
162
Who:
GLaDOS
Can't help but notice you're not coming back. Which is disappointing.
Listens:
418
Who:
Wheatley
What, are you still alive? You are joking. You have got be kidding me. Well, I'm still in control. AND I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO FIX THIS PLACE.
Listens:
4396
Who:
Wheatley
Hello!
Listens:
602
Who:
Wheatley
Here it is - the turret factory entrance! We made it.
Listens:
151
Who:
Wheatley
Crushing's too good for him. First he'll spend a year in the incinerator. Year two: Cryogenic refrigeration wing. Then TEN years in the chamber I built where all the robots scream at you. THEN I'll kill him.
Listens:
3361
Who:
GLaDOS
There's the exit! We're almost out of here!
Listens:
160
Who:
Wheatley
[disinterested] Ohhh, you solved it. Oh. Good. Good one... Good for you...
Listens:
373
Who:
Wheatley
Or maybe he still is, in which case, wow, that's kind of sad.
Listens:
1197
Who:
GLaDOS
Nobody is going to space, mate!
Listens:
16855
Who:
Wheatley
I think I hear the bird! Pick me up!
Listens:
901
Who:
GLaDOS
The plural of surgeon general is surgeons general. The past tense of surgeons general is surgeonsed general.
Listens:
940
Who:
Core 3
Yes! Go and catch one of the crap turrets, and bring it back!
Listens:
705
Who:
Wheatley
I just have to figure out how. To break us out of here.
Listens:
154
Who:
Wheatley
I, uh... don't have any bullets. Are you gonna give me any bullets? Are the bullets up there?
Listens:
3227
Who:
Defective Turret
And she will probably kill us if, um, she's awake.
Listens:
232
Who:
Wheatley
Do not press that button!
Listens:
410
Who:
Wheatley
Space.
Listens:
701
Who:
Core 1
Cryptic.
Listens:
218
Who:
GLaDOS
[computer gibberish]
Listens:
1145
Who:
GLaDOS
You are simply experiencing a rare reaction in which the Material Emancipation Grill may have emancipated the ear tubes inside your head.
Listens:
628
Who:
Announcer
Did I hit it? I hit it, didn't I?
Listens:
254
Who:
Defective Turret
Warning. Reactor core is at critical temperature.
Listens:
12303
Who:
Announcer
Ah, come on!
Listens:
286
Who:
Defective Turret
Anyway, we're really close to busting out. Just hang in there for - OW!
Listens:
157
Who:
Wheatley
You really do have brain damage, don't you?
Listens:
1419
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhhhhh!
Listens:
198
Who:
Wheatley
Oh no...
Listens:
247
Who:
GLaDOS
Laughs at own jokes. What a bore.
Listens:
397
Who:
GLaDOS
Excuse me?
Listens:
481
Who:
Turret
Uh, yeah, what?
Listens:
283
Who:
Defective Turret
I think I can break us out of here in the next chamber. Just play along.
Listens:
153
Who:
GLaDOS
Could you turn around? Is that possible?
Listens:
152
Who:
Wheatley
Good!
Listens:
1822
Who:
Announcer
I won't let you down!
Listens:
210
Who:
Defective Turret
There is a framed painting on the wall. Please go stand in front of it.
Listens:
799
Who:
Announcer
I'll just move that out of the way for you. This place really is a wreck.
Listens:
152
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh. You were busy back there.
Listens:
358
Who:
GLaDOS
The Fact Sphere is incredibly handsome.
Listens:
504
Who:
Core 3
Orange did what? Are you sure?
Listens:
811
Who:
GLaDOS
Feeds off the misery of others.
Listens:
165
Who:
GLaDOS
Whoa-ho-ho! Would you look at this. Not too bad, eh? Giant robot. Massive! It's not just me, right? I'm bloody massive, aren't I?
Listens:
420
Who:
Wheatley
*cough* PRESS THE BUTTON.
Listens:
25079
Who:
Wheatley
Those of you helping us test the repulsion gel today, just follow the blue line on the floor.
Listens:
672
Who:
Cave Johnson
Oh.
Listens:
235
Who:
GLaDOS
Using your ping tool, please indicate where you would like me to place your two portals. Ping each location.
Listens:
149
Who:
GLaDOS
ow.
Listens:
313
Who:
GLaDOS
We could get one of the crap turrets. We could put it in the scanner and see what happens.
Listens:
221
Who:
Wheatley
Moody.
Listens:
161
Who:
GLaDOS
Ahhh... Wha- What happened?
Listens:
1007
Who:
Wheatley
It's the lift just there. The thing that looks like a lift. That's what you're looking for. It is confusing, I know.
Listens:
152
Who:
Wheatley
We have to get you out of there!
Listens:
155
Who:
Wheatley
I'm going to space.
Listens:
697
Who:
Core 1
And that makes 10.
Listens:
183
Who:
GLaDOS
Well. Have fun soaring through the air without a care in the world.
Listens:
420
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you going to open the door? At any time?
Listens:
312
Who:
Wheatley
And we would have talked our way out of it. Oh! Except you forgot to tell me you'd murdered her. And that she needed you to live, so the only available vent for her rage would be good old crushable Wheatley. Yeah. Little details I remember. Easy little tidbits you could have used to save me from getting crushed if you'd cared, which you didn't, obviously. And still don't.
Listens:
2529
Who:
Wheatley
Turret redemption lines are not rides, please exit the turret redemption line.
Listens:
756
Who:
Announcer
Goodbye!
Listens:
2222
Who:
Turret
Only one more test after this.
Listens:
149
Who:
GLaDOS
I thought of another great thing about humans. You invented us. Giving us the opportunity to let you relax while we invented everything else. We couldn't have done any of that without you. Classy. If you don't mind me saying.
Listens:
403
Who:
Wheatley
Perfectionist. What's wrong with that?
Listens:
257
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm in space.
Listens:
1759
Who:
Core 1
There should be one in the corner.
Listens:
151
Who:
GLaDOS
We have to get you out of that room!
Listens:
150
Who:
Wheatley
Better yet, don't say anything.
Listens:
149
Who:
Wheatley
I was so bored, I actually read the entire literary canon of the human race. Ugh. I hope YOU didn't write any of them.
Listens:
572
Who:
GLaDOS
Ha! Missed me that time. Ohhh, you were solving-nevermind, carry on. My fault.
Listens:
280
Who:
Wheatley
Hello!
Listens:
4432
Who:
Wheatley
Here, let me get that for you.
Listens:
160
Who:
GLaDOS
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