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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
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Portal 1 Music
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TF2 Music
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You seem to have defeated its load-bearing capacity. Well done. I'll just lower the ceiling.
Listens:
249
Who:
GLaDOS
Ha ha ha ha ha. Did I tell you the one about the turned-off reassembly machine?
Listens:
249
Who:
GLaDOS
Starting now, if I'm honest, to wonder if you're not doing all this screen-breaking on purpose. Beginning to take it personally. You know what I mean? It's like an insult to me.
Listens:
249
Who:
Wheatley
Please wave to your partner.
Listens:
248
Who:
GLaDOS
What happened? What, what, what have you put onto me? What is that?
Listens:
248
Who:
Wheatley
The reserve power ran out, so of course the whole relaxation center stops waking up the bloody test subjects.
Listens:
248
Who:
Wheatley
Congratulations on completing the Aperture Science standard cooperative testing courses.
Listens:
247
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm sorry. The arrows seem to have rusted off. Good luck.
Listens:
247
Who:
GLaDOS
I can't believe you came back.
Listens:
247
Who:
GLaDOS
You know what makes me laugh? The thought of you cutting that out.
Listens:
247
Who:
GLaDOS
Oo! I've got an idea!
Listens:
247
Who:
Wheatley
And here's the best part. There's a conveyor belt that will convey you in convenient comfort right into the masher. You won't have to lift a finger. Everything's been taken care of. Didn't have to. Didn't have to do that.
Listens:
247
Who:
Wheatley
Still running. Alright. Looks tiring. Tell you what - you stop running and I'll stop bombing you... That seems fair.
Listens:
247
Who:
Wheatley
Ha! Missed me that time. Ohhh, you were solving-nevermind, carry on. My fault.
Listens:
247
Who:
Wheatley
A computer. Not a surprise. Expected. Check that off the list. Computer identified. Tick.
Listens:
247
Who:
Wheatley
In order to ensure that sufficient power remains for core testing protocols, all safety devices have been disabled.
Listens:
246
Who:
GLaDOS
Wish there was more books! But there's not.
Listens:
246
Who:
Wheatley
eight
Listens:
245
Who:
GLaDOS
But not entirely my fault! You shoulda seen the SIZE of that thing, it was huge! I should have gotten a raise for all the times I DIDN'T bump into it.
Listens:
245
Who:
Wheatley
Oh my.
Listens:
245
Who:
Turret
All right, you know what, it's gonna be best if you can get him to say something first. It's just better if I have a set-up.
Listens:
244
Who:
Core 2
Congratulations. I am sure if I had the time to repair these tests, you would have never completed them. So again, congratulations on completing the broken easy tests.
Listens:
244
Who:
GLaDOS
Good. You have a dual portal device. There should be a way back to the testing area up ahead.
Listens:
243
Who:
GLaDOS
Tell ya what, why don't you put me down and I'll make a distraction.
Listens:
242
Who:
Core 2
Yeah! How'd you like that?
Listens:
242
Who:
Core 2
Every time you fail, it's a reminder of the way things used to be. But then there you are. Again. Like nothing happened.
Listens:
242
Who:
GLaDOS
I heard gunfire! A bit late for this, but look out for gunfire! Probably doesn't help at this point, but I have at least tried.
Listens:
241
Who:
Wheatley
Also, once I eject myself out of the core the lift might stop. Then we'd be trapped in a lift full of broken glass suspended fifty feet off the ground.
Listens:
240
Who:
Wheatley
Ay. Double Pee-Ell-Ee.
Listens:
240
Who:
Wheatley
Hi there!
Listens:
240
Who:
Defective Turret
Technical... Ummm... You'll need to turn around while I do this.
Listens:
239
Who:
Wheatley
No variances detected.
Listens:
238
Who:
GLaDOS
NO!
Listens:
238
Who:
GLaDOS
But now, looking around, seeing Aperture restored to its former glory? You don't have to worry about leaving EVER again. I mean that.
Listens:
238
Who:
GLaDOS
No!
Listens:
238
Who:
Wheatley
Can you see the portal gun?
Listens:
238
Who:
Wheatley
Well, let's do some tests and see what happens.
Listens:
236
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Sorry. The lift. Sorry. I keep forgetting.
Listens:
236
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah, how ya doin'?
Listens:
236
Who:
Defective Turret
After seeing what he's done to my facility -- after we take over again -- is it alright if I kill him?
Listens:
235
Who:
GLaDOS
It wasn't anything personal. Just... you know. You DID kill me. Fair's fair.
Listens:
235
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you alive down there?
Listens:
235
Who:
Wheatley
five
Listens:
234
Who:
GLaDOS
Run!
Listens:
234
Who:
Wheatley
The...um... sorry.. I wouldn't say smelly. Just attending to the humans.
Listens:
234
Who:
Wheatley
No, wait, wait!
Listens:
234
Who:
Defective Turret
Alarmist.
Listens:
233
Who:
GLaDOS
She did all the work.
Listens:
233
Who:
GLaDOS
Dang.
Listens:
233
Who:
Defective Turret
There. Bing! Perfect. On you go.
Listens:
232
Who:
Wheatley
What's that behind you? It's only a robot on a bloody stick! A different one!
Listens:
232
Who:
Wheatley
Welcome back to the hub, did you fail at selecting the correct course?
Listens:
231
Who:
GLaDOS
You see that button over there? You just need to ARRRRRGH!
Listens:
231
Who:
Wheatley
Plug me into that stick on the wall over there. I'll show you something.
Listens:
231
Who:
Wheatley
Seriously, I'm not joking. Could you just turn around for a second?
Listens:
231
Who:
Wheatley
You know what? Go ahead and jump. You've got braces on your legs. No braces on your arms, though. Gonna have to rely on the old human strength to keep a grip on the device and, by extension, me. So do. Do make sure to maintain a grip.
Listens:
231
Who:
Wheatley
Blue, you are the most advanced model of robot Aperture Science has ever discontinued.
Listens:
230
Who:
GLaDOS
How is this even science, without the possibility of death?
Listens:
230
Who:
GLaDOS
Thanks!
Listens:
230
Who:
GLaDOS
Hold on, I'll stop the elevator. Anything? Take your time...
Listens:
230
Who:
GLaDOS
A somersault is just falling over in style. Congratulations on being clumsy.
Listens:
230
Who:
GLaDOS
Ahhh...
Listens:
230
Who:
Wheatley
This is AMAZING! We can walk wherever we want! Look, just... go left! No, go right, go right! Don't even care, don't even care, just go where ever you want, couldn't care less.
Listens:
230
Who:
Wheatley
Best of luck, lady!
Listens:
230
Who:
Defective Turret
Oh, come on!
Listens:
230
Who:
Defective Turret
How is this even science, without the consequence of death?
Listens:
229
Who:
GLaDOS
I'll give you a hint. Button. That's all I'm gonna say. One word. Button.
Listens:
229
Who:
Wheatley
Do not press that button!
Listens:
229
Who:
Wheatley
clickclickclick
Listens:
229
Who:
Defective Turret
Cheater.
Listens:
228
Who:
GLaDOS
All those pieces of the ceiling that keep falling out? Probably actually pieces of the ceiling, I'll bet. That looked real. But it doesn't signify anything, is my point.
Listens:
227
Who:
Wheatley
Ohhh. Remember when you picked me up? Five seconds ago! Ohhh, that was amazing! Do it again, pick me up again!
Listens:
227
Who:
Wheatley
This time...
Listens:
227
Who:
Defective Turret
Still, if it were, Orange would be winning.
Listens:
226
Who:
GLaDOS
Am I interrupting your important conversation?
Listens:
226
Who:
GLaDOS
Wait here. Don't go anywhere. I'll be back.
Listens:
226
Who:
GLaDOS
ow.
Listens:
226
Who:
GLaDOS
If groups of hunter-gatherers appear to have made this - or any - test chamber their home, DO NOT AGITATE THEM. Test through them.
Listens:
226
Who:
GLaDOS
Well done. You know, when I woke up and saw the state of the labs, I started to wonder if there was any point to going on. I came THAT close to just giving up and letting you go.
Listens:
226
Who:
GLaDOS
No!
Listens:
226
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah, what?
Listens:
226
Who:
Defective Turret
Startles easily. Boo!
Listens:
225
Who:
GLaDOS
Dang.
Listens:
225
Who:
Defective Turret
Well, I did my best.
Listens:
225
Who:
Defective Turret
Luckily, you don't feel pain. At any rate, you don't have a way to communicate that you feel pain.
Listens:
224
Who:
GLaDOS
four
Listens:
224
Who:
GLaDOS
All right. I’m going to bring this farce to a close before someone sustains a serious Tic-Tac-Toe-Two-related injury.
Listens:
224
Who:
GLaDOS
Then we'd come and find you. And rip your gross little stupid sphere body out of MY body, and put me back in.
Listens:
224
Who:
GLaDOS
Dang!
Listens:
224
Who:
Defective Turret
Uh, yeah, what?
Listens:
224
Who:
Defective Turret
Your failing does not make this science.
Listens:
223
Who:
GLaDOS
Do you know why they abandoned this course? Too deadly.
Listens:
223
Who:
GLaDOS
Hold on. Couldn't we just use that conversion gel?
Listens:
223
Who:
GLaDOS
Solve his puzzle for him. When he comes back, I'll hit him with a paradox.
Listens:
223
Who:
GLaDOS
I know we're in a lot of trouble and probably about to die.
Listens:
223
Who:
GLaDOS
Leave me in! Leave me in! Go press it!
Listens:
223
Who:
Wheatley
Well, I tried. Best of luck!
Listens:
223
Who:
Defective Turret
Here it comes, pal!
Listens:
223
Who:
Defective Turret
Excellent. I think you have earned a break from the official testing courses.
Listens:
222
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey! Hey! It's me! I'm okay!
Listens:
222
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
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