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Portal 2
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TF2 Music
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You will never go into space.
Listens:
1078
Who:
Core 3
Go press the button! Go press it!
Listens:
1078
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey lady.
Listens:
1077
Who:
Core 1
Hello again, did you know these are the only set of tests available to you... you are going to need to select them again.
Listens:
1074
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Yes. Well done.
Listens:
1074
Who:
Wheatley
I don't want to drive a wedge between the two of you, but I've been studying Blue's performance, and I don't know how to put this... I'm certain you're trying very hard.
Listens:
1072
Who:
GLaDOS
Which involves deadly lasers and how test subjects react when locked in a room with deadly lasers.
Listens:
1069
Who:
GLaDOS
What's a guy gotta do to get some bullets around here?
Listens:
1069
Who:
Defective Turret
Hey lady. Lady.
Listens:
1067
Who:
Core 1
Space. Space. Gonna go to space.
Listens:
1066
Who:
Core 1
Yes. Please. Space.
Listens:
1066
Who:
Core 1
Really? Okay.
Listens:
1066
Who:
GLaDOS
Those of you helping us test the repulsion gel today, just follow the blue line on the floor.
Listens:
1063
Who:
Cave Johnson
Your business is appreciated
Listens:
1061
Who:
Turret
One: No portal surfaces.
Listens:
1060
Who:
Wheatley
Spheres that insist on going into space are inferior to spheres that don't.
Listens:
1058
Who:
Core 3
'Lair' - heh, weird isn't it? First time I've said it out loud. Sounds a bit ridiculous, really. But I can assure you it is one. A proper lair. Deadly lair.
Listens:
1057
Who:
Wheatley
Hey.
Listens:
1056
Who:
Core 1
I love space. Love space.
Listens:
1055
Who:
Core 1
Yes, I see you waving.
Listens:
1055
Who:
GLaDOS
[out of breath] Okay. That's probably the bird, isn't it? That laid the eggs! Livid!
Listens:
1054
Who:
Wheatley
Because of the technical difficulties we are currently experiencing, your test environment is unsupervised.
Listens:
1052
Who:
Announcer
Space.
Listens:
1051
Who:
Core 1
Are we in space?
Listens:
1051
Who:
Core 1
Space.
Listens:
1049
Who:
Core 1
I love space.
Listens:
1049
Who:
Core 1
Oh! Oh oh! Yes. Alright. Just had a brainwave. I'll be back. If you're still alive. I'll be back. Don't die until I get back.
Listens:
1049
Who:
Wheatley
He will most likely kill you, violently.
Listens:
1046
Who:
Core 3
Avocados have the highest fiber and calories of any fruit. They are found in Australians.
Listens:
1046
Who:
Core 3
Love space. Need to go to space.
Listens:
1045
Who:
Core 1
I made it all up.
Listens:
1045
Who:
GLaDOS
I thought we fixed that.
Listens:
1045
Who:
Defective Turret
The Enrichment Center will now provide a list of numbers and fruits. Write them down as they will become important later in the experiment. Not the fruits, though. Seven. Avocado. Forty. Please continue into the next test chamber.
Listens:
1043
Who:
GLaDOS
As an impartial collaboration facilitator, it would be unfair of me to name my favorite member of your team. However, it’s perfectly fair to hint at it in a way that my least favorite member probably isn't smart enough to understand. Rhymeswithglue. Orange you are doing very well.
Listens:
1043
Who:
GLaDOS
I’m scared!
Listens:
1039
Who:
Turret
Going to space.
Listens:
1038
Who:
Core 1
Oh well. We have warehouses FULL of the things. Absolutely worthless. I'm happy to get rid of them.
Listens:
1038
Who:
GLaDOS
Wanna go to space.
Listens:
1037
Who:
Core 1
'Yeah? Well this thorn... is about to take you down.' Man, that sounded a whole lot better in my head.
Listens:
1037
Who:
Core 2
Space space wanna go to space
Listens:
1035
Who:
Core 1
We're not gonna release this stuff into the wild until it's good and damn ready, so as long as you keep yourself in top physical form, there'll always be a limo waiting for you.
Listens:
1034
Who:
Cave Johnson
For that Blue is penalized fifty science collaboration points.
Listens:
1032
Who:
GLaDOS
Blah.
Listens:
1032
Who:
GLaDOS
Space wanna go wanna go to space wanna go to space
Listens:
1030
Who:
Core 1
Please go to space.
Listens:
1030
Who:
Core 1
While I was out investigating, I found a fascinating new test element. It's never been used for human testing because, apparently, contact with it causes heart failure. The literature doesn't mention anything about lump-of-coal failure, though, so you should be fine.
Listens:
1029
Who:
GLaDOS
Wanna go to -- wanna go to space
Listens:
1028
Who:
Core 1
Hey.
Listens:
1028
Who:
Core 1
Well. I suppose we could just sit in this room and glare at each other until somebody drops dead, but I have a better idea.
Listens:
1026
Who:
GLaDOS
The testing area's just up ahead. The quicker you get through, the quicker you'll get your sixty bucks.
Listens:
1025
Who:
Cave Johnson
Luckily I'm a bigger person than that. I'm happy to put this all behind us and get back to work. After all, we've got a lot to do, and only sixty more years to do it. More or less. I don't have the actuarial tables in front of me.
Listens:
1025
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm going. Going to space.
Listens:
1024
Who:
Core 1
Your test assignment will vary, depending on the manner in which you have bent the world to your will.
Listens:
1023
Who:
Cave Johnson
Rats cannot throw up.
Listens:
1023
Who:
Core 3
Ohhh! Are you having a laugh?
Listens:
1023
Who:
Wheatley
Don't forget!
Listens:
1022
Who:
Turret
Put me in the game, coach!
Listens:
1022
Who:
Defective Turret
Ow!
Listens:
1020
Who:
Turret
If you had any belongings, please pick them up now. We don't want old newspapers and sticks cluttering up the building.
Listens:
1019
Who:
Cave Johnson
clickclickclick
Listens:
1016
Who:
Defective Turret
Hello!
Listens:
1015
Who:
Wheatley
Gonna be in space.
Listens:
1012
Who:
Core 1
Space.
Listens:
1011
Who:
Core 1
Three: Bomb-proof shields for me. Leading directly into number Four: Bombs. For throwing at you.
Listens:
1009
Who:
Wheatley
You have just passed through an Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grill, which vaporizes most Aperture Science equipment that touches it.
Listens:
1008
Who:
Announcer
I'm going to space.
Listens:
1007
Who:
Core 1
Oh, remember the time I took over the facility? Greatest moment of my life, but you just wanted to leave. Didn't want to share in my success. Well, so you know, I'd be happy for you if you succeeded. Apart from right now, obviously.
Listens:
1007
Who:
Wheatley
Wanna go to space. Space.
Listens:
1006
Who:
Core 1
Owwww!
Listens:
1006
Who:
Turret
I'm not going to lie to you, the odds are a million to one. And that's with some generous rounding.
Listens:
1005
Who:
GLaDOS
This course was created and then abandoned by humans. They tend to do that, create something wonderful and then abandon it.
Listens:
1000
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, DON'T PANIC! I can still stop it, not a problem. There's a password! I'll just hack it. Here we go.
Listens:
999
Who:
Wheatley
Nice catch, Orange.
Listens:
998
Who:
GLaDOS
Ah. I tell ya. Humans. Love 'em. Just... The way they look is great. And their... folklore. Wonderful isn't it? Very colorful...
Listens:
998
Who:
Wheatley
This is a sterile environment; please refrain from riding on the turret line.
Listens:
996
Who:
Announcer
Here, let me put on some adventure music.
Listens:
996
Who:
Core 2
Horrible people skills.
Listens:
996
Who:
GLaDOS
Back again!
Listens:
996
Who:
Defective Turret
Oh, this is ridiculous!
Listens:
996
Who:
Defective Turret
Two: Start the neurotoxin immediately.
Listens:
995
Who:
Wheatley
Hey! Squeaky-voice! How'd I do?
Listens:
990
Who:
Defective Turret
Anyway. Just finished the last one. The hardest one. Machiavelli. Do not know what all the fuss was about. Understood it perfectly. Have you read that one?
Listens:
989
Who:
Wheatley
Ah for Pete's sake!
Listens:
989
Who:
Defective Turret
Defective Turret testing active.
Listens:
987
Who:
Announcer
Don't press it! COME BACK!
Listens:
987
Who:
Wheatley
They're not even your screens to break. It's vandalism. It's pure vandalism. You wouldn't do this if this was your house, would you? If I came around to your house smashin' your telly to bits, you'd be furious. And rightly so. Unbelievable.
Listens:
987
Who:
Wheatley
Hold on. Those are raccoons. Homo sapiens only, please.
Listens:
986
Who:
GLaDOS
Put me down!
Listens:
986
Who:
Turret
Hello.
Listens:
985
Who:
Wheatley
Please do not engage with turrets heading towards redemption.
Listens:
983
Who:
Announcer
ONE Catchmecatchmecatchmecatchmecatchme
Listens:
983
Who:
Wheatley
Thank you for completing the testing courses. If you enjoyed your experience, you may now re-enter the testing course of your choice.
Listens:
982
Who:
Announcer
What? No, you pressed that bAGGGHHHHHH
Listens:
981
Who:
Wheatley
I talked my way onto the nanobot work crew rebuilding this shaft. They're REALLY small, so they have very tiny little brains. But there're a billion of 'em, so it's only a matter of time until ONE of them notices I'm the size of a planet.
Listens:
981
Who:
Wheatley
Owww!
Listens:
981
Who:
Turret
The two of you have forged an excellent partnership, with one of you handling the cerebral challenges and the other ready to ponderously waddle into action should the test suddenly become an eating contest.
Listens:
980
Who:
GLaDOS
Please avoid alerting active turrets or being shot by active turrets.
Listens:
979
Who:
Announcer
Uhoh
Listens:
979
Who:
Turret
The first commercial airline flight took to the air in 1914. Everyone involved screamed the entire way.
Listens:
978
Who:
Core 3
Hey
Listens:
978
Who:
Turret
00:00 / 00:00
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