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Portal 2
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Portal 1 Music
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TF2 Music
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You will never go into space.
Listens:
991
Who:
Core 3
Space. Space. Go to space.
Listens:
989
Who:
Core 1
Space wanna go wanna go to space wanna go to space
Listens:
989
Who:
Core 1
Your business is appreciated
Listens:
989
Who:
Turret
Blah.
Listens:
987
Who:
GLaDOS
Hold on, [click click click] Ah, the bloody bombs are stuck on. Doesn't matter - I've reconfigured the shields.
Listens:
987
Who:
Wheatley
Hey lady.
Listens:
986
Who:
Core 1
Baking Soda Volcano. Well, at least it's not a potato battery, I'll give it that. Still not terrifically original, though. Not exactly primary research, even within the child sciences.
Listens:
986
Who:
Wheatley
So. Boom. Better offer here is just kill yourself. Seems like a lot of effort to walk all the way to my deadly lair, when there's a perfectly serviceable death option right there. Again: not a death trap. Your death would be entirely voluntary. And very much appreciated.
Listens:
985
Who:
Wheatley
Now, you already met one another on the limo ride over, so let me introduce myself.
Listens:
984
Who:
Cave Johnson
Let's go - let's go to space. Let's go to space.
Listens:
982
Who:
Core 1
Spheres that insist on going into space are inferior to spheres that don't.
Listens:
982
Who:
Core 3
Space.
Listens:
976
Who:
Core 1
Wanna go to -- wanna go to space
Listens:
975
Who:
Core 1
[out of breath] Okay. That's probably the bird, isn't it? That laid the eggs! Livid!
Listens:
975
Who:
Wheatley
Ow!
Listens:
974
Who:
Turret
I don't want to drive a wedge between the two of you, but I've been studying Blue's performance, and I don't know how to put this... I'm certain you're trying very hard.
Listens:
973
Who:
GLaDOS
Space.
Listens:
972
Who:
Core 1
Wanna go to space. Space.
Listens:
970
Who:
Core 1
Love space. Need to go to space.
Listens:
970
Who:
Core 1
Hello again, did you know these are the only set of tests available to you... you are going to need to select them again.
Listens:
970
Who:
GLaDOS
You are simply experiencing a rare reaction in which the Material Emancipation Grill may have emancipated the ear tubes inside your head.
Listens:
969
Who:
Announcer
I'm going to space.
Listens:
969
Who:
Core 1
There. If you have any questions, just remember what I said in slow motion. Test on your own recognizance, I'll be right back.
Listens:
969
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes! Go and catch one of the crap turrets, and bring it back!
Listens:
969
Who:
Wheatley
Space space wanna go to space
Listens:
968
Who:
Core 1
Please go to space.
Listens:
968
Who:
Core 1
Gonna be in space.
Listens:
966
Who:
Core 1
Hey.
Listens:
965
Who:
Core 1
Wanna go to space.
Listens:
965
Who:
Core 1
One: No portal surfaces.
Listens:
965
Who:
Wheatley
Your test assignment will vary, depending on the manner in which you have bent the world to your will.
Listens:
964
Who:
Cave Johnson
'Lair' - heh, weird isn't it? First time I've said it out loud. Sounds a bit ridiculous, really. But I can assure you it is one. A proper lair. Deadly lair.
Listens:
964
Who:
Wheatley
Going to space.
Listens:
960
Who:
Core 1
Those of you helping us test the repulsion gel today, just follow the blue line on the floor.
Listens:
959
Who:
Cave Johnson
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm going. Going to space.
Listens:
958
Who:
Core 1
If you had any belongings, please pick them up now. We don't want old newspapers and sticks cluttering up the building.
Listens:
957
Who:
Cave Johnson
Avocados have the highest fiber and calories of any fruit. They are found in Australians.
Listens:
957
Who:
Core 3
Please note the incandescent particle field across the exit. This Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grill will vaporize any unauthorized equipment that passes through it.
Listens:
956
Who:
Announcer
We're not gonna release this stuff into the wild until it's good and damn ready, so as long as you keep yourself in top physical form, there'll always be a limo waiting for you.
Listens:
956
Who:
Cave Johnson
The testing area's just up ahead. The quicker you get through, the quicker you'll get your sixty bucks.
Listens:
956
Who:
Cave Johnson
Oh, remember the time I took over the facility? Greatest moment of my life, but you just wanted to leave. Didn't want to share in my success. Well, so you know, I'd be happy for you if you succeeded. Apart from right now, obviously.
Listens:
956
Who:
Wheatley
clickclickclick
Listens:
956
Who:
Defective Turret
Corruption at 50%
Listens:
954
Who:
Core 3
Oh! Oh oh! Yes. Alright. Just had a brainwave. I'll be back. If you're still alive. I'll be back. Don't die until I get back.
Listens:
953
Who:
Wheatley
While I was out investigating, I found a fascinating new test element. It's never been used for human testing because, apparently, contact with it causes heart failure. The literature doesn't mention anything about lump-of-coal failure, though, so you should be fine.
Listens:
951
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhh! Are you having a laugh?
Listens:
950
Who:
Wheatley
I thought we fixed that.
Listens:
949
Who:
Defective Turret
Ah for Pete's sake!
Listens:
949
Who:
Defective Turret
Go press the button! Go press it!
Listens:
944
Who:
GLaDOS
This course was created and then abandoned by humans. They tend to do that, create something wonderful and then abandon it.
Listens:
940
Who:
GLaDOS
Don't forget!
Listens:
935
Who:
Turret
Back again!
Listens:
933
Who:
Defective Turret
Owww!
Listens:
932
Who:
Turret
Which involves deadly lasers and how test subjects react when locked in a room with deadly lasers.
Listens:
930
Who:
GLaDOS
Put me in the game, coach!
Listens:
930
Who:
Defective Turret
I made it all up.
Listens:
929
Who:
GLaDOS
Two: Start the neurotoxin immediately.
Listens:
929
Who:
Wheatley
Put me down!
Listens:
929
Who:
Turret
What? No, you pressed that bAGGGHHHHHH
Listens:
924
Who:
Wheatley
Rats cannot throw up.
Listens:
923
Who:
Core 3
Take me with you...
Listens:
922
Who:
Turret
For that Blue is penalized fifty science collaboration points.
Listens:
921
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, DON'T PANIC! I can still stop it, not a problem. There's a password! I'll just hack it. Here we go.
Listens:
921
Who:
Wheatley
Horrible people skills.
Listens:
920
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Yes. Well done.
Listens:
920
Who:
Wheatley
Uhoh
Listens:
918
Who:
Turret
Hello!
Listens:
915
Who:
Wheatley
Owwww!
Listens:
915
Who:
Turret
Well. I suppose we could just sit in this room and glare at each other until somebody drops dead, but I have a better idea.
Listens:
912
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello.
Listens:
912
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah, I'm uh... I'm a bad man!
Listens:
912
Who:
Defective Turret
Hold on. Those are raccoons. Homo sapiens only, please.
Listens:
910
Who:
GLaDOS
'Skeletons.' Right, I guess I DID stockpile some tests.
Listens:
910
Who:
GLaDOS
I talked my way onto the nanobot work crew rebuilding this shaft. They're REALLY small, so they have very tiny little brains. But there're a billion of 'em, so it's only a matter of time until ONE of them notices I'm the size of a planet.
Listens:
909
Who:
Wheatley
The first commercial airline flight took to the air in 1914. Everyone involved screamed the entire way.
Listens:
906
Who:
Core 3
Luckily I'm a bigger person than that. I'm happy to put this all behind us and get back to work. After all, we've got a lot to do, and only sixty more years to do it. More or less. I don't have the actuarial tables in front of me.
Listens:
905
Who:
GLaDOS
Here, let me put on some adventure music.
Listens:
903
Who:
Core 2
Please do not engage with turrets heading towards redemption.
Listens:
901
Who:
Announcer
Nice catch, Orange.
Listens:
899
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh well. We have warehouses FULL of the things. Absolutely worthless. I'm happy to get rid of them.
Listens:
898
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay don't panic! Allright? Stop panicking! I can still stop this. Ahh. Oh there's a password. It's fine. I'll just hack it. Not a problem... umm...
Listens:
895
Who:
Wheatley
Hi again!
Listens:
895
Who:
Defective Turret
Three: Bomb-proof shields for me. Leading directly into number Four: Bombs. For throwing at you.
Listens:
894
Who:
Wheatley
Pleased to meetcha.
Listens:
894
Who:
Defective Turret
Searching
Listens:
891
Who:
Turret
ONE Catchmecatchmecatchmecatchmecatchme
Listens:
890
Who:
Wheatley
The Enrichment Center will now provide a list of numbers and fruits. Write them down as they will become important later in the experiment. Not the fruits, though. Seven. Avocado. Forty. Please continue into the next test chamber.
Listens:
889
Who:
GLaDOS
Aggressive. I like that.
Listens:
889
Who:
GLaDOS
The hardest part of any hack is the figuring-out-how-to-start phase. That's always tricky. But... Let the games begin.
Listens:
889
Who:
Wheatley
Oh, that's funny, is it? Because we've been at this twelve hours and you haven't solved it either, so I don't know why you're laughing.
Listens:
888
Who:
Wheatley
Oh God! Oh, don't need to do that anymore. The jig is up, RUN!
Listens:
888
Who:
Wheatley
'Yeah? Well this thorn... is about to take you down.' Man, that sounded a whole lot better in my head.
Listens:
887
Who:
Core 2
Good. You made it to one of the human habitats. We're looking for an artifact. Think of it as an archeological dig.
Listens:
885
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.
Listens:
885
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, this is ridiculous!
Listens:
884
Who:
Defective Turret
Halley's Comet can be viewed orbiting Earth every seventy-six years. For the other seventy-five, it retreats to the heart of the sun, where it hibernates undisturbed.
Listens:
883
Who:
Core 3
The two of you have forged an excellent partnership, with one of you handling the cerebral challenges and the other ready to ponderously waddle into action should the test suddenly become an eating contest.
Listens:
883
Who:
GLaDOS
Paradoxes.
Listens:
883
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, listen, let me lay something on you here. It's pretty heavy. They told me NEVER NEVER EVER to disengage myself from my Management Rail. Or I would DIE. But we're out of options here. So... get ready to catch me, alright, on the off chance that I'm not dead the moment I pop off this thing.
Listens:
882
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
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