Please make sure you own these games if you are going to listen to their content!
News: Loading...
Quote:
Who:
Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
Portal 2 Music
Portal 1
Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
Like
+1
Tweet
@Portal2Sounds
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
Popular
Original Order
Random
This site requires that
Javascript be enabled
.
Go press the button! Go press it!
Listens:
1062
Who:
GLaDOS
Space. Space. Gonna go to space.
Listens:
1061
Who:
Core 1
What's a guy gotta do to get some bullets around here?
Listens:
1061
Who:
Defective Turret
Hey lady. Lady.
Listens:
1058
Who:
Core 1
Hey lady.
Listens:
1057
Who:
Core 1
Your business is appreciated
Listens:
1057
Who:
Turret
Really? Okay.
Listens:
1056
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Yes. Well done.
Listens:
1056
Who:
Wheatley
Hello again, did you know these are the only set of tests available to you... you are going to need to select them again.
Listens:
1055
Who:
GLaDOS
I don't want to drive a wedge between the two of you, but I've been studying Blue's performance, and I don't know how to put this... I'm certain you're trying very hard.
Listens:
1053
Who:
GLaDOS
Which involves deadly lasers and how test subjects react when locked in a room with deadly lasers.
Listens:
1052
Who:
GLaDOS
Spheres that insist on going into space are inferior to spheres that don't.
Listens:
1051
Who:
Core 3
Those of you helping us test the repulsion gel today, just follow the blue line on the floor.
Listens:
1047
Who:
Cave Johnson
I love space. Love space.
Listens:
1046
Who:
Core 1
Because of the technical difficulties we are currently experiencing, your test environment is unsupervised.
Listens:
1045
Who:
Announcer
Are we in space?
Listens:
1045
Who:
Core 1
Hey.
Listens:
1044
Who:
Core 1
He will most likely kill you, violently.
Listens:
1043
Who:
Core 3
Yes, I see you waving.
Listens:
1043
Who:
GLaDOS
I love space.
Listens:
1042
Who:
Core 1
Avocados have the highest fiber and calories of any fruit. They are found in Australians.
Listens:
1041
Who:
Core 3
One: No portal surfaces.
Listens:
1041
Who:
Wheatley
Space.
Listens:
1040
Who:
Core 1
Let's go - let's go to space. Let's go to space.
Listens:
1040
Who:
Core 1
As an impartial collaboration facilitator, it would be unfair of me to name my favorite member of your team. However, it’s perfectly fair to hint at it in a way that my least favorite member probably isn't smart enough to understand. Rhymeswithglue. Orange you are doing very well.
Listens:
1039
Who:
GLaDOS
'Lair' - heh, weird isn't it? First time I've said it out loud. Sounds a bit ridiculous, really. But I can assure you it is one. A proper lair. Deadly lair.
Listens:
1038
Who:
Wheatley
Love space. Need to go to space.
Listens:
1037
Who:
Core 1
[out of breath] Okay. That's probably the bird, isn't it? That laid the eggs! Livid!
Listens:
1035
Who:
Wheatley
Wanna go to space.
Listens:
1034
Who:
Core 1
Space.
Listens:
1033
Who:
Core 1
Space space wanna go to space
Listens:
1031
Who:
Core 1
Oh! Oh oh! Yes. Alright. Just had a brainwave. I'll be back. If you're still alive. I'll be back. Don't die until I get back.
Listens:
1030
Who:
Wheatley
The Enrichment Center will now provide a list of numbers and fruits. Write them down as they will become important later in the experiment. Not the fruits, though. Seven. Avocado. Forty. Please continue into the next test chamber.
Listens:
1029
Who:
GLaDOS
Going to space.
Listens:
1028
Who:
Core 1
I made it all up.
Listens:
1026
Who:
GLaDOS
I thought we fixed that.
Listens:
1024
Who:
Defective Turret
Space wanna go wanna go to space wanna go to space
Listens:
1023
Who:
Core 1
Please go to space.
Listens:
1023
Who:
Core 1
Wanna go to -- wanna go to space
Listens:
1022
Who:
Core 1
We're not gonna release this stuff into the wild until it's good and damn ready, so as long as you keep yourself in top physical form, there'll always be a limo waiting for you.
Listens:
1021
Who:
Cave Johnson
Hey.
Listens:
1020
Who:
Core 1
Blah.
Listens:
1019
Who:
GLaDOS
Rats cannot throw up.
Listens:
1016
Who:
Core 3
While I was out investigating, I found a fascinating new test element. It's never been used for human testing because, apparently, contact with it causes heart failure. The literature doesn't mention anything about lump-of-coal failure, though, so you should be fine.
Listens:
1016
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm going. Going to space.
Listens:
1015
Who:
Core 1
For that Blue is penalized fifty science collaboration points.
Listens:
1015
Who:
GLaDOS
Well. I suppose we could just sit in this room and glare at each other until somebody drops dead, but I have a better idea.
Listens:
1015
Who:
GLaDOS
If you had any belongings, please pick them up now. We don't want old newspapers and sticks cluttering up the building.
Listens:
1014
Who:
Cave Johnson
The testing area's just up ahead. The quicker you get through, the quicker you'll get your sixty bucks.
Listens:
1014
Who:
Cave Johnson
Ow!
Listens:
1014
Who:
Turret
'Yeah? Well this thorn... is about to take you down.' Man, that sounded a whole lot better in my head.
Listens:
1012
Who:
Core 2
Ohhh! Are you having a laugh?
Listens:
1012
Who:
Wheatley
Your test assignment will vary, depending on the manner in which you have bent the world to your will.
Listens:
1011
Who:
Cave Johnson
Don't forget!
Listens:
1011
Who:
Turret
Luckily I'm a bigger person than that. I'm happy to put this all behind us and get back to work. After all, we've got a lot to do, and only sixty more years to do it. More or less. I don't have the actuarial tables in front of me.
Listens:
1010
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh well. We have warehouses FULL of the things. Absolutely worthless. I'm happy to get rid of them.
Listens:
1007
Who:
GLaDOS
clickclickclick
Listens:
1006
Who:
Defective Turret
Gonna be in space.
Listens:
1005
Who:
Core 1
I'm sorry. The arrows seem to have rusted off. Good luck.
Listens:
1005
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello!
Listens:
1005
Who:
Wheatley
Space.
Listens:
1001
Who:
Core 1
Oh, remember the time I took over the facility? Greatest moment of my life, but you just wanted to leave. Didn't want to share in my success. Well, so you know, I'd be happy for you if you succeeded. Apart from right now, obviously.
Listens:
1001
Who:
Wheatley
Put me in the game, coach!
Listens:
1001
Who:
Defective Turret
Wanna go to space. Space.
Listens:
1000
Who:
Core 1
I'm going to space.
Listens:
999
Who:
Core 1
Okay, DON'T PANIC! I can still stop it, not a problem. There's a password! I'll just hack it. Here we go.
Listens:
998
Who:
Wheatley
You have just passed through an Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grill, which vaporizes most Aperture Science equipment that touches it.
Listens:
996
Who:
Announcer
Owwww!
Listens:
995
Who:
Turret
Three: Bomb-proof shields for me. Leading directly into number Four: Bombs. For throwing at you.
Listens:
993
Who:
Wheatley
Nice catch, Orange.
Listens:
990
Who:
GLaDOS
This course was created and then abandoned by humans. They tend to do that, create something wonderful and then abandon it.
Listens:
989
Who:
GLaDOS
Back again!
Listens:
988
Who:
Defective Turret
Oh, this is ridiculous!
Listens:
988
Who:
Defective Turret
Horrible people skills.
Listens:
986
Who:
GLaDOS
Ah for Pete's sake!
Listens:
986
Who:
Defective Turret
This is a sterile environment; please refrain from riding on the turret line.
Listens:
983
Who:
Announcer
Two: Start the neurotoxin immediately.
Listens:
980
Who:
Wheatley
Put me down!
Listens:
979
Who:
Turret
I'm not going to lie to you, the odds are a million to one. And that's with some generous rounding.
Listens:
978
Who:
GLaDOS
Here, let me put on some adventure music.
Listens:
977
Who:
Core 2
ONE Catchmecatchmecatchmecatchmecatchme
Listens:
976
Who:
Wheatley
Please avoid alerting active turrets or being shot by active turrets.
Listens:
974
Who:
Announcer
I talked my way onto the nanobot work crew rebuilding this shaft. They're REALLY small, so they have very tiny little brains. But there're a billion of 'em, so it's only a matter of time until ONE of them notices I'm the size of a planet.
Listens:
974
Who:
Wheatley
Don't press it! COME BACK!
Listens:
973
Who:
Wheatley
Anyway. Just finished the last one. The hardest one. Machiavelli. Do not know what all the fuss was about. Understood it perfectly. Have you read that one?
Listens:
973
Who:
Wheatley
Please do not engage with turrets heading towards redemption.
Listens:
972
Who:
Announcer
Defective Turret testing active.
Listens:
972
Who:
Announcer
Hold on. Those are raccoons. Homo sapiens only, please.
Listens:
972
Who:
GLaDOS
What? No, you pressed that bAGGGHHHHHH
Listens:
971
Who:
Wheatley
Take me with you...
Listens:
971
Who:
Turret
Thank you for completing the testing courses. If you enjoyed your experience, you may now re-enter the testing course of your choice.
Listens:
970
Who:
Announcer
Ah. I tell ya. Humans. Love 'em. Just... The way they look is great. And their... folklore. Wonderful isn't it? Very colorful...
Listens:
969
Who:
Wheatley
I’m scared!
Listens:
969
Who:
Turret
Uhoh
Listens:
969
Who:
Turret
They're not even your screens to break. It's vandalism. It's pure vandalism. You wouldn't do this if this was your house, would you? If I came around to your house smashin' your telly to bits, you'd be furious. And rightly so. Unbelievable.
Listens:
968
Who:
Wheatley
The first commercial airline flight took to the air in 1914. Everyone involved screamed the entire way.
Listens:
967
Who:
Core 3
Good. You made it to one of the human habitats. We're looking for an artifact. Think of it as an archeological dig.
Listens:
967
Who:
GLaDOS
'Skeletons.' Right, I guess I DID stockpile some tests.
Listens:
967
Who:
GLaDOS
Pleased to meetcha.
Listens:
964
Who:
Defective Turret
Owww!
Listens:
964
Who:
Turret
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
Like these quotes? Share them with your friends!