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Portal 2
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Portal 1 Music
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TF2 Music
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Heh heh heh heh...
Listens:
325
Who:
Defective Turret
Yeah, how ya doin'?
Listens:
325
Who:
Defective Turret
But now, looking around, seeing Aperture restored to its former glory? You don't have to worry about leaving EVER again. I mean that.
Listens:
324
Who:
GLaDOS
[tired breathing] Nevermind. Nevermind. Solve it yourself. You're on your own.
Listens:
323
Who:
Wheatley
Nope. Okay. A... A... A... A... A... C.
Listens:
323
Who:
Wheatley
Best of luck, lady!
Listens:
323
Who:
Defective Turret
Yeah, I GOT it, didn't I?
Listens:
323
Who:
Defective Turret
MOVE.
Listens:
322
Who:
Wheatley
There. Bing! Perfect. On you go.
Listens:
322
Who:
Wheatley
Also, a note: No braces on your spine, either. So don't land on that. Or your head, no braces there. That could split like a melon from this height. [nervous chuckle] Do definitely focus on landing with your legs.
Listens:
322
Who:
Wheatley
Still, if it were, Orange would be winning.
Listens:
321
Who:
GLaDOS
clickclickclick
Listens:
321
Who:
Defective Turret
ORANGE, please observe your partner's favorite animal.
Listens:
320
Who:
GLaDOS
And here's the best part. There's a conveyor belt that will convey you in convenient comfort right into the masher. You won't have to lift a finger. Everything's been taken care of. Didn't have to. Didn't have to do that.
Listens:
320
Who:
Wheatley
No!
Listens:
320
Who:
Wheatley
Welcome back to the hub, did you fail at selecting the correct course?
Listens:
319
Who:
GLaDOS
clickclickclick
Listens:
319
Who:
Defective Turret
Did I hit it? I hit it, didn't I?
Listens:
319
Who:
Defective Turret
Why should I be kept informed about the life functions of the ten thousand bloody test subjects I'm supposed to be in charge of?
Listens:
318
Who:
Wheatley
Well, I did my best.
Listens:
318
Who:
Defective Turret
YEAH! What's happening?
Listens:
318
Who:
Defective Turret
I’m sorry, Subject Orange.
Listens:
317
Who:
GLaDOS
You know what makes me laugh? The thought of you cutting that out.
Listens:
317
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Sorry. The lift. Sorry. I keep forgetting.
Listens:
317
Who:
Wheatley
Come back!
Listens:
317
Who:
Wheatley
Starting now, if I'm honest, to wonder if you're not doing all this screen-breaking on purpose. Beginning to take it personally. You know what I mean? It's like an insult to me.
Listens:
317
Who:
Wheatley
Plug me into that stick on the wall over there. I'll show you something.
Listens:
317
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah, alright.
Listens:
316
Who:
Defective Turret
All those pieces of the ceiling that keep falling out? Probably actually pieces of the ceiling, I'll bet. That looked real. But it doesn't signify anything, is my point.
Listens:
315
Who:
Wheatley
Oh no...
Listens:
314
Who:
GLaDOS
But not entirely my fault! You shoulda seen the SIZE of that thing, it was huge! I should have gotten a raise for all the times I DIDN'T bump into it.
Listens:
314
Who:
Wheatley
This is AMAZING! We can walk wherever we want! Look, just... go left! No, go right, go right! Don't even care, don't even care, just go where ever you want, couldn't care less.
Listens:
314
Who:
Wheatley
All right, you know what, it's gonna be best if you can get him to say something first. It's just better if I have a set-up.
Listens:
313
Who:
Core 2
Perfectionist. What's wrong with that?
Listens:
313
Who:
GLaDOS
You know, I'd tell you if I were dead. Courtesy. Mark of a civil society. So, just let me know.
Listens:
312
Who:
Wheatley
Uhhh, no bullets. Sorry.
Listens:
312
Who:
Defective Turret
Try one of those childish gestures.
Listens:
311
Who:
GLaDOS
Let's look at their files...
Listens:
311
Who:
GLaDOS
And it almost killed me.
Listens:
310
Who:
GLaDOS
Well played.
Listens:
310
Who:
Defective Turret
How is this even science, without the possibility of death?
Listens:
309
Who:
GLaDOS
Solve his puzzle for him. When he comes back, I'll hit him with a paradox.
Listens:
309
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, what? How stupid does she think we are?
Listens:
309
Who:
Wheatley
Humans! That's what you look like right now.
Listens:
308
Who:
GLaDOS
Violent temper. Oh, I'd like to see that.
Listens:
308
Who:
GLaDOS
A somersault is just falling over in style. Congratulations on being clumsy.
Listens:
308
Who:
GLaDOS
All right. I’m going to bring this farce to a close before someone sustains a serious Tic-Tac-Toe-Two-related injury.
Listens:
307
Who:
GLaDOS
Very good. You’ve really come together as a team. Thanks to the one of you who appears to be doing all of the work.
Listens:
307
Who:
GLaDOS
You know what? Go ahead and jump. You've got braces on your legs. No braces on your arms, though. Gonna have to rely on the old human strength to keep a grip on the device and, by extension, me. So do. Do make sure to maintain a grip.
Listens:
307
Who:
Wheatley
Well, I tried.
Listens:
307
Who:
Defective Turret
Hold on, I'll stop the elevator. Anything? Take your time...
Listens:
306
Who:
GLaDOS
I created this test to let the humans feel good about themselves. It is extremely easy. Just follow the arrows.
Listens:
305
Who:
GLaDOS
I know we're in a lot of trouble and probably about to die.
Listens:
305
Who:
GLaDOS
And again, not playing along. You're ruining what are some really good speeches, actually.
Listens:
305
Who:
Wheatley
See that scanner out there? It's deciding which turrets to keep and which to toss. And it's using that MASTER turret as a template! If we pull out the template turret, it'll shut down the whole production line.
Listens:
305
Who:
Wheatley
Well done. You know, when I woke up and saw the state of the labs, I started to wonder if there was any point to going on. I came THAT close to just giving up and letting you go.
Listens:
304
Who:
GLaDOS
Nevermind. I have to go... check something. Test on your own recognizance. I'll be back.
Listens:
304
Who:
GLaDOS
As the name implies, there are only two minor differences: One, the board; two, the rules.
Listens:
303
Who:
GLaDOS
You can't die in any of those ways.
Listens:
303
Who:
GLaDOS
You do know I can't wave back right?
Listens:
303
Who:
GLaDOS
GAH!
Listens:
303
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah.
Listens:
303
Who:
Defective Turret
It's been a pleasure!
Listens:
303
Who:
Defective Turret
Think about this.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
Go on. Get a goooood lonnnnng look.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm going to be honest with you now. Not fake honest like before, but real honest, like you're incapable of. I know you're up to something.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
No. Wait, did I do B? Do you have a pen? Start writing these down.
Listens:
301
Who:
Wheatley
Oh.
Listens:
301
Who:
Defective Turret
These tests are potentially lethal when communication, teamwork and mutual respect are not employed at all times. Naturally this will pose an interesting challenge for one of you, given the other’s performance so far.
Listens:
300
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay. Okay. Okay listen: New plan. Act natural act natural. We've done nothing wrong.
Listens:
300
Who:
Wheatley
Heh heh heh...
Listens:
300
Who:
Defective Turret
Hold on. Couldn't we just use that conversion gel?
Listens:
299
Who:
GLaDOS
If groups of hunter-gatherers appear to have made this - or any - test chamber their home, DO NOT AGITATE THEM. Test through them.
Listens:
299
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhh. Remember when you picked me up? Five seconds ago! Ohhh, that was amazing! Do it again, pick me up again!
Listens:
299
Who:
Wheatley
You KNOW her?
Listens:
299
Who:
Wheatley
You should both be familiar with the game of Tic-Tac-Toe.
Listens:
298
Who:
GLaDOS
Emotional problems.
Listens:
298
Who:
GLaDOS
If the subject survived the test, we let them purchase the pictures for $5. If the subject died, we gave the photo to their next of kin free of charge.
Listens:
298
Who:
GLaDOS
How is this even science, without the consequence of death?
Listens:
298
Who:
GLaDOS
Look!
Listens:
298
Who:
GLaDOS
Brilliant you made it through! Well done! Follow me, we've still got work to do. At least she can't touch us back here.
Listens:
298
Who:
Wheatley
Locked and loaded!
Listens:
298
Who:
Defective Turret
Yeah, let's do this.
Listens:
298
Who:
Defective Turret
I’ll just save the safety information about the dangerous experiment you’re about to do for AFTER the experiment.
Listens:
297
Who:
GLaDOS
Your failing does not make this science.
Listens:
296
Who:
GLaDOS
Excellent. The Enrichment Center reminds you that bold, persistent experimentation is the hallmark of good science.
Listens:
296
Who:
GLaDOS
Notice the moat area. Very deadly. Extremely dangerous. Eventually. Not at the moment. Still working on it, still working on it.
Listens:
296
Who:
Wheatley
Leave me in! Leave me in! Go press it!
Listens:
296
Who:
Wheatley
Maybe I shouldn't send you outside of the official testing courses, you are picking up some bad human traits.
Listens:
295
Who:
GLaDOS
Have you worked out the one good trait humans have, yet?
Listens:
295
Who:
GLaDOS
Credit where credit's due: you're both doing a great job of disappointing me.
Listens:
295
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, my facility.
Listens:
295
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah, that's right. Little bullseye.
Listens:
295
Who:
Defective Turret
I just hate Blue a little more.
Listens:
294
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Thanks.
Listens:
294
Who:
GLaDOS
Then we'd come and find you. And rip your gross little stupid sphere body out of MY body, and put me back in.
Listens:
294
Who:
GLaDOS
Stay casual when I tell you this: I think I smell neurotoxin.
Listens:
294
Who:
Wheatley
I spy with my little eye, something that starts with 'f'.
Listens:
294
Who:
Wheatley
Orange now has a Portal Device. Finally.
Listens:
293
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
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