Please make sure you own these games if you are going to listen to their content!
News: Loading...
Quote:
Who:
Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
Portal 2 Music
Portal 1
Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
Like
+1
Tweet
@Portal2Sounds
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
Popular
Original Order
Random
This site requires that
Javascript be enabled
.
Nope. Okay. A... A... A... A... A... C.
Listens:
304
Who:
Wheatley
Best of luck, lady!
Listens:
304
Who:
Defective Turret
clickclickclick
Listens:
304
Who:
Defective Turret
All right. You create a distraction then, and I'll distract him from YOUR distraction.
Listens:
303
Who:
Core 2
Luckily, you don't feel pain. At any rate, you don't have a way to communicate that you feel pain.
Listens:
303
Who:
GLaDOS
She did all the work.
Listens:
303
Who:
GLaDOS
But not entirely my fault! You shoulda seen the SIZE of that thing, it was huge! I should have gotten a raise for all the times I DIDN'T bump into it.
Listens:
303
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah, I GOT it, didn't I?
Listens:
303
Who:
Defective Turret
Still, if it were, Orange would be winning.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
Congratulations. I am sure if I had the time to repair these tests, you would have never completed them. So again, congratulations on completing the broken easy tests.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
But now, looking around, seeing Aperture restored to its former glory? You don't have to worry about leaving EVER again. I mean that.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
You know what makes me laugh? The thought of you cutting that out.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
Come back!
Listens:
302
Who:
Wheatley
Agggh...
Listens:
302
Who:
Defective Turret
I'll give you a hint. Button. That's all I'm gonna say. One word. Button.
Listens:
301
Who:
Wheatley
Wait here. Don't go anywhere. I'll be back.
Listens:
300
Who:
GLaDOS
Why should I be kept informed about the life functions of the ten thousand bloody test subjects I'm supposed to be in charge of?
Listens:
300
Who:
Wheatley
Oh! Sorry. The lift. Sorry. I keep forgetting.
Listens:
299
Who:
Wheatley
Not getting better with age!
Listens:
299
Who:
Defective Turret
MOVE.
Listens:
298
Who:
Wheatley
Well, I did my best.
Listens:
298
Who:
Defective Turret
Um.
Listens:
298
Who:
Defective Turret
All right, you know what, it's gonna be best if you can get him to say something first. It's just better if I have a set-up.
Listens:
297
Who:
Core 2
clickclickclick
Listens:
297
Who:
Defective Turret
No!
Listens:
296
Who:
Wheatley
I’m sorry, Subject Orange.
Listens:
295
Who:
GLaDOS
All those pieces of the ceiling that keep falling out? Probably actually pieces of the ceiling, I'll bet. That looked real. But it doesn't signify anything, is my point.
Listens:
295
Who:
Wheatley
This is AMAZING! We can walk wherever we want! Look, just... go left! No, go right, go right! Don't even care, don't even care, just go where ever you want, couldn't care less.
Listens:
295
Who:
Wheatley
Uhhh, no bullets. Sorry.
Listens:
295
Who:
Defective Turret
Oh no...
Listens:
294
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, what? How stupid does she think we are?
Listens:
294
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah, alright.
Listens:
294
Who:
Defective Turret
clickclickclick
Listens:
294
Who:
Defective Turret
YEAH! What's happening?
Listens:
294
Who:
Defective Turret
ORANGE, please observe your partner's favorite animal.
Listens:
292
Who:
GLaDOS
Solve his puzzle for him. When he comes back, I'll hit him with a paradox.
Listens:
291
Who:
GLaDOS
You know what? Go ahead and jump. You've got braces on your legs. No braces on your arms, though. Gonna have to rely on the old human strength to keep a grip on the device and, by extension, me. So do. Do make sure to maintain a grip.
Listens:
290
Who:
Wheatley
A somersault is just falling over in style. Congratulations on being clumsy.
Listens:
289
Who:
GLaDOS
Brilliant you made it through! Well done! Follow me, we've still got work to do. At least she can't touch us back here.
Listens:
288
Who:
Wheatley
Let's look at their files...
Listens:
287
Who:
GLaDOS
Hold on, I'll stop the elevator. Anything? Take your time...
Listens:
287
Who:
GLaDOS
Well played.
Listens:
287
Who:
Defective Turret
Perfectionist. What's wrong with that?
Listens:
286
Who:
GLaDOS
And it almost killed me.
Listens:
286
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm going to be honest with you now. Not fake honest like before, but real honest, like you're incapable of. I know you're up to something.
Listens:
286
Who:
GLaDOS
And again, not playing along. You're ruining what are some really good speeches, actually.
Listens:
285
Who:
Wheatley
Okay. Okay. Okay listen: New plan. Act natural act natural. We've done nothing wrong.
Listens:
285
Who:
Wheatley
How is this even science, without the possibility of death?
Listens:
284
Who:
GLaDOS
Did I hit it? I hit it, didn't I?
Listens:
284
Who:
Defective Turret
I know we're in a lot of trouble and probably about to die.
Listens:
283
Who:
GLaDOS
Leave me in! Leave me in! Go press it!
Listens:
283
Who:
Wheatley
See that scanner out there? It's deciding which turrets to keep and which to toss. And it's using that MASTER turret as a template! If we pull out the template turret, it'll shut down the whole production line.
Listens:
283
Who:
Wheatley
Humans! That's what you look like right now.
Listens:
282
Who:
GLaDOS
How is this even science, without the consequence of death?
Listens:
282
Who:
GLaDOS
Hold on. Couldn't we just use that conversion gel?
Listens:
282
Who:
GLaDOS
If groups of hunter-gatherers appear to have made this - or any - test chamber their home, DO NOT AGITATE THEM. Test through them.
Listens:
281
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah, let's do this.
Listens:
281
Who:
Defective Turret
Well, I tried.
Listens:
281
Who:
Defective Turret
All right. I’m going to bring this farce to a close before someone sustains a serious Tic-Tac-Toe-Two-related injury.
Listens:
280
Who:
GLaDOS
Try one of those childish gestures.
Listens:
280
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes, you 'solved' it, but I'm wondering if there are a number of ways to solve them and you're picking all the worst ways.
Listens:
280
Who:
Wheatley
Violent temper. Oh, I'd like to see that.
Listens:
279
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, my facility.
Listens:
279
Who:
GLaDOS
Nevermind. I have to go... check something. Test on your own recognizance. I'll be back.
Listens:
279
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah.
Listens:
279
Who:
Defective Turret
Think about this.
Listens:
278
Who:
GLaDOS
I created this test to let the humans feel good about themselves. It is extremely easy. Just follow the arrows.
Listens:
278
Who:
GLaDOS
Look!
Listens:
278
Who:
GLaDOS
Excellent. The Enrichment Center reminds you that bold, persistent experimentation is the hallmark of good science.
Listens:
278
Who:
GLaDOS
You do know I can't wave back right?
Listens:
278
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhh. Remember when you picked me up? Five seconds ago! Ohhh, that was amazing! Do it again, pick me up again!
Listens:
278
Who:
Wheatley
Hey! Oi oi! I'm up here!
Listens:
278
Who:
Wheatley
Watch and learn, everybody. Watch and learn.
Listens:
278
Who:
Defective Turret
Well done. You know, when I woke up and saw the state of the labs, I started to wonder if there was any point to going on. I came THAT close to just giving up and letting you go.
Listens:
277
Who:
GLaDOS
GAH!
Listens:
277
Who:
Wheatley
It's been a pleasure!
Listens:
277
Who:
Defective Turret
Very good. You’ve really come together as a team. Thanks to the one of you who appears to be doing all of the work.
Listens:
276
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh.
Listens:
276
Who:
GLaDOS
I just hate Blue a little more.
Listens:
276
Who:
GLaDOS
Look down. Who's that, down there, talking? It's me! Down on the floor. Needing you to pick me up.
Listens:
276
Who:
Wheatley
Let go of me!
Listens:
275
Who:
Wheatley
No. Wait, did I do B? Do you have a pen? Start writing these down.
Listens:
275
Who:
Wheatley
Locked and loaded!
Listens:
275
Who:
Defective Turret
Emotional problems.
Listens:
274
Who:
GLaDOS
Stay casual when I tell you this: I think I smell neurotoxin.
Listens:
274
Who:
Wheatley
If you ARE there, would you mind... giving me a little bit of help? [nervous laugh] Just picking me up.
Listens:
274
Who:
Wheatley
Heh heh heh...
Listens:
274
Who:
Defective Turret
Maybe I shouldn't send you outside of the official testing courses, you are picking up some bad human traits.
Listens:
273
Who:
GLaDOS
You should both be familiar with the game of Tic-Tac-Toe.
Listens:
273
Who:
GLaDOS
Your failing does not make this science.
Listens:
273
Who:
GLaDOS
Do you know why they abandoned this course? Too deadly.
Listens:
273
Who:
GLaDOS
If the subject survived the test, we let them purchase the pictures for $5. If the subject died, we gave the photo to their next of kin free of charge.
Listens:
273
Who:
GLaDOS
I spy with my little eye, something that starts with 'f'.
Listens:
273
Who:
Wheatley
They'll probably throw you a party.
Listens:
272
Who:
GLaDOS
Don't worry. You can't die. They will just reassemble you.
Listens:
272
Who:
GLaDOS
So sometimes there's still trash in them. Standing around. Smelling, and being useless.
Listens:
272
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhhh, here we go... here it comes...
Listens:
272
Who:
Wheatley
Ah! Brilliant. You made it through, well done.
Listens:
272
Who:
Wheatley
Well, you bested me this time.
Listens:
272
Who:
Defective Turret
Then we'd come and find you. And rip your gross little stupid sphere body out of MY body, and put me back in.
Listens:
271
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
Like these quotes? Share them with your friends!
