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Portal 2
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Hold on, who-?
Listens:
329
Who:
GLaDOS
All we had to do was pull that lever.
Listens:
329
Who:
GLaDOS
There. Try it now.
Listens:
329
Who:
GLaDOS
And check this out! I'm a bloody genius now!
Listens:
329
Who:
Wheatley
Well, I gave it everything I could. Can't ask for more than that.
Listens:
329
Who:
Defective Turret
Agh! You're alive! Great!
Listens:
328
Who:
Wheatley
If you want to just call it quits, we could just sit here. Forever. That's an option. Option A: Sit here. Do nothing. Option B: Go through there, and if she's alive, she'll almost certainly kill us.
Listens:
328
Who:
Wheatley
That's another fifty point penalty.
Listens:
327
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes, thanks. We get it.
Listens:
327
Who:
GLaDOS
Alright. [nervous laugh] Can't do it if you're leering at me. Creepy.
Listens:
327
Who:
Wheatley
Hold on, something's wrong! Neurotoxin level's up to 50%! No, it's down. Sorry, my mistake. I meant to say it's down to fifty percent. Good news! Carry on!
Listens:
327
Who:
Wheatley
Please get it off me.
Listens:
326
Who:
GLaDOS
[whispered] ...I think she's lying...
Listens:
326
Who:
Wheatley
Do you smell neurotoxin?
Listens:
326
Who:
Wheatley
Duck and weave, duck and weave! Ohh, the sweet science.
Listens:
324
Who:
Core 2
It would be pointless for either of us to hurt Blue’s feelings. But it’s clear to everyone monitoring the test who’s carrying who here.
Listens:
324
Who:
GLaDOS
Did you think that would be funny?
Listens:
324
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeghh!
Listens:
323
Who:
Wheatley
Are you okay? Are you - Don't answer that. I'm absolutely sure you're fine. There's plenty of time for you to recover. Just take it slow.
Listens:
323
Who:
Wheatley
Still, if it were, Blue would be winning.
Listens:
322
Who:
GLaDOS
But I overcame my handicap. That's a true story.
Listens:
322
Who:
GLaDOS
Congratulations. Not on the test.
Listens:
322
Who:
GLaDOS
Let's see here, exit exit exit... there is no exit.
Listens:
322
Who:
Wheatley
You see that button over there? You just need to ARRRRRGH!
Listens:
320
Who:
Wheatley
Corrupted cores! We're in luck.
Listens:
319
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm actually asking. Because I have no idea. He's not listed anywhere in the employee database.
Listens:
318
Who:
GLaDOS
I know you.
Listens:
318
Who:
GLaDOS
Not so fast!
Listens:
317
Who:
GLaDOS
To clarify, I was being a little bit facetious about wanting to get rid of monitors. They're actually really quite useful. So I do want them around. So if you could just avoid smashing them.
Listens:
317
Who:
Wheatley
Preparing to love this... don't want to build it up too much... but I think this one's going to be good, I can tell...
Listens:
317
Who:
Wheatley
Oh, this is ridiculous!
Listens:
317
Who:
Defective Turret
Without the consequence of death, is this even science?
Listens:
314
Who:
GLaDOS
I would prefer to speak to one of you in private but since that is not an option here, I will speak in code that only one of you will understand. Blue: Orange is plotting to destroy you.
Listens:
314
Who:
GLaDOS
Hmm. This emancipation grill is broken.
Listens:
314
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah.
Listens:
313
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, have it your way. What, are you fighting that guy? You got that under control there? Cuz it looks like there's a lot of stuff on fire...
Listens:
312
Who:
Core 2
Alright, fine. I'm not saying another word until you do it properly. I'm sick of this.
Listens:
312
Who:
Wheatley
Look for a switch that says ESCAPE POD. Alright? Don't touch ANYTHING else.
Listens:
312
Who:
Wheatley
clickclickclick
Listens:
312
Who:
Defective Turret
Look, anyway. I've spoken enough. Take your time. I'll let you think about it. I don't want to pressure you: is it the lair? Is it the masher? You know what my opinion is: Masher. I'm leaning toward masher. Up to you. Just gonna give you some time to think
Listens:
311
Who:
Wheatley
AH! I- Sorry, I just looked down. I do not recommend it.
Listens:
311
Who:
Wheatley
Keep it up, baby! You're creamin' him!
Listens:
310
Who:
Core 2
Two
Listens:
310
Who:
GLaDOS
Dang.
Listens:
310
Who:
Defective Turret
Uhhh, no bullets. Sorry.
Listens:
310
Who:
Defective Turret
Do you know who dances around like an imbecile when they accomplish the tiniest little thing?
Listens:
309
Who:
GLaDOS
Maybe you two have never met humans? They are as bad as you might think, smelly, gross, annoying, often wanting to try and kill you. But they do make great test subjects.
Listens:
309
Who:
GLaDOS
NOT a team player.
Listens:
309
Who:
GLaDOS
NO!
Listens:
309
Who:
GLaDOS
You're the type of show-off who only shows off really stupid things.
Listens:
309
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you going to open the door? At any time?
Listens:
309
Who:
Wheatley
Nothing. He's good. This one. He is good. I'm gonna need to break out the expert level hacking maneuvers now. You asked for it Mate.
Listens:
309
Who:
Wheatley
It seems kind of silly to point this out, since you're running around plotting to destroy me. But I'd say we're done testing.
Listens:
308
Who:
GLaDOS
Weak, tired and apprehensive. Wow, this one's the total package.
Listens:
308
Who:
GLaDOS
ow.
Listens:
308
Who:
GLaDOS
Where we going? What are we doing? Agh!
Listens:
308
Who:
Defective Turret
Thanks to you, I know where to find them, I removed their security and powered up their - uh - rescue door.
Listens:
307
Who:
GLaDOS
Do not press that button!
Listens:
307
Who:
Wheatley
Please wave to your partner.
Listens:
305
Who:
GLaDOS
Sorry.
Listens:
305
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah, hey, how ya doin'?
Listens:
305
Who:
Defective Turret
Did something happen? [yawn] I wasn't watching.
Listens:
304
Who:
GLaDOS
A... A... A... A... A... A.
Listens:
304
Who:
Wheatley
Blue now has a Portal Device. Finally.
Listens:
303
Who:
GLaDOS
Remember when I told you that he was specifically designed to make bad decisions? Because I think he's decided not to maintain any of the crucial functions required to keep this facility from exploding.
Listens:
303
Who:
GLaDOS
You didn't do anything.
Listens:
303
Who:
GLaDOS
To get to the Vault, you are going to need to use all the tricks you have learned. To help, I have made these tests extremely difficult.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
Oo! I've got an idea!
Listens:
302
Who:
Wheatley
Uh oh.
Listens:
302
Who:
Wheatley
This time...
Listens:
302
Who:
Defective Turret
eight
Listens:
301
Who:
GLaDOS
I wonder if that dancing has some effect on you?
Listens:
301
Who:
GLaDOS
Ignores task at hand. Won't for long.
Listens:
301
Who:
GLaDOS
Always weeping. Poor thing.
Listens:
300
Who:
GLaDOS
You've got one hour! Solve it!
Listens:
300
Who:
Wheatley
Look at this! No rail to tell us where to go! OH, this is brilliant. We can go where ever we want! Hold on, though, where are we going? Seriously. Hang on, let me just get my bearings. Hm. Just follow the rail, actually.
Listens:
300
Who:
Wheatley
No knife? That's fine. I know all about pressure points.
Listens:
298
Who:
Core 2
This is a bridge-building exercise. The humans were miserable at this, mostly because you can't build bridges out of tears.
Listens:
298
Who:
GLaDOS
What happened? What, what, what have you put onto me? What is that?
Listens:
298
Who:
Wheatley
Hi there!
Listens:
298
Who:
Defective Turret
The irony is that you were almost at the last test.
Listens:
297
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay. New plan. Act natural. We've done NOTHING wrong.
Listens:
297
Who:
Wheatley
The reserve power ran out, so of course the whole relaxation center stops waking up the bloody test subjects.
Listens:
297
Who:
Wheatley
Agggh, not again!
Listens:
297
Who:
Defective Turret
How's that taste, pal?
Listens:
296
Who:
Core 2
BAM! Secret panel! That I opened. While your back was turned.
Listens:
296
Who:
Wheatley
five
Listens:
295
Who:
GLaDOS
I'll bet you're both dying to know what your big surprise is. Only TWO more chambers!
Listens:
295
Who:
Wheatley
After you told me to turn the beam off, I thought I'd lost you. Went poking around for other test subjects. No luck there. Everyone's still all dead.
Listens:
295
Who:
Wheatley
A computer. Not a surprise. Expected. Check that off the list. Computer identified. Tick.
Listens:
295
Who:
Wheatley
What's going on? Who turned off the lights?
Listens:
294
Who:
GLaDOS
This next test involves discouragement redirection cubes. I'd just finished building them before you had your, well, episode. So now we'll both get to see how they work.
Listens:
294
Who:
GLaDOS
Say. Remember when we cleared the air back there? Is there... anything you want to say to me? Anything?
Listens:
294
Who:
GLaDOS
Ah. That just cleans right off, does it? Well, that would have been good to know. A little earlier.
Listens:
294
Who:
Wheatley
If at first you don't succeed, quit and try another course.
Listens:
293
Who:
GLaDOS
I'd love to help you solve the tests. But I can't.
Listens:
293
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh. No. I fizzled that one too.
Listens:
292
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm fully connected. I can see everything.
Listens:
292
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm sorry. The arrows seem to have rusted off. Good luck.
Listens:
292
Who:
GLaDOS
Sorry about the lift. It's, uh... out of service. Because it melted.
Listens:
292
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
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